This resignation letter has been making the rounds by email. Whaddya think?
The conventional wisdom about farewell emails and resignation letters is to keep them short and sweet. Say as little as possible, and only say positive things, even if untrue (“I greatly enjoyed my time at [Biglaw X]“). Above all, don’t burn any bridges.
But if you’re leaving the legal profession altogether — and you’re really, really sure that you’re never coming back — is it okay to let off some steam? To tell them how you REALLY feel?
Please opine on that question, and anything else you see in this farewell letter, in the comments.
(But please don’t name the individual who sent this letter. We’ve intentionally redacted his name from the missive. Thanks.)
P.S. Speaking of Greenberg Traurig, does anyone know what ever happened on this insane front? Did the firm ever respond? If you can enlighten us, please do so by email. Thanks.
This resignation letter has been making the rounds by email. Whaddya think?
We’re still accepting amusing or embarrassing summer associate stories. If you have one to share, please review our submission guidelines, and then email us.
And now, on to today’s story:
1. Superhero name: The Claw
2. Special power: The ability to pinch every cent out of the summer lunch budget.
3. Summered: Vault 50-100 firm (DC), summer 2005 [Firm name intentionally omitted to allow more details without danger of revealing identity.]
4. Claim to fame: From our tipster:
“Harvard 1L ordered a five-pound lobster during lunch at The Palm (~$100). Wrapped huge (empty) claw in napkin, returned to office, took photo, and emailed photo to a number of people, including several prominent partners who had been at another table in the restaurant.”
5. What happened next: “To much astonishment (and consternation) inside the firm, The Claw received an offer to return for 2L summer. Turned this offer down, however, reportedly because it required too long a return period.”
“According to well-substantiated rumor, The Claw then went to another DC firm for 2L summer, where various acts of poor judgment and attitude resulted in a no-offer. The Claw’s success during 3L interviewing is currently unknown.”
The usual rules apply: please do NOT name this former SA, or speculate about his identity, in the comments. Thanks.
Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of summer associates (scroll down)
“Note this help wanted ad for a new DC ALJ (from the July 9 edition of the Legal Times).”
“I ask you: Coincidence, or just good planning?”
Hmm… A salary pushing the six-figures, and the ability to call yourself — or at least make restaurant reservations under — “judge”? That gig doesn’t sound half-bad…
Earlier: Roy Pearson: From Pseudo-Judge To Ex-Pseudo-Judge?
We often miss New York, where we lived for five years before moving down to Washington. But not all the time. We didn’t miss it last month, for example, when there was that huge steam pipe explosion.
Or today, when the city was thrown into chaos by massive rains and flooding. From a Gotham tipster:
Did you hear that the subways in much of NYC were flooded out this morning, due to a fierce rainstorm very early? It was coming down in torrents when I went to the gym this morning at 5:30, my usual time, although it had basically stopped by the time I headed for the subway at 8 a.m.
I ended up walking over 2 hours to get to school…. Might be a fun thread to ask how biglaw folks in NYC got to work today.
So, how about it — any insane tales of commuting? Or bizarre summer associate projects related thereto?
(Go ahead, vent — it’s okay. We care, we really do!)
Flooding Cripples Subway System [City Room / New York Times]
New York City Transit System Is Crippled by Flooding [New York Times]
MTA MAYHEM [WCBS via Drudge Report]
Here’s some follow-up on our Lawsuit of the Day, Greer v. 1-800-Flowers. Plaintiff Leroy Greer is suing the online florist for revealing to his wife that he had flowers delivered to his girlfriend — resulting in said wife divorcing his sorry ass.
Some readers who have seen the complaint offered these comments:
1. “I’ve never heard of these lawyers [Kennitra M. Foote & Associates]. They’re definitely not powerhouses of the Houston bar.”
2. In terms of damages, “the guy is asking for $1 million (it’s in the demand letter).”
3. “Please note on page 25 (the receipt) that the delivery “MUST INCLUDE… Cuddly Plush/ Stuffed Animal” (emphasis in original). The occasion for the flowers was “Love & Romance.”
Yup, that’s right. Take a look at the receipt for yourself (Exhibit D to Greer’s Complaint):
Note the handwritten scrawl at the bottom of the receipt, presumably from Greer’s wife: “Be a man! If you got caught red handed then don’t still lie. Your tmobile has her number so why still lie.”
Interesting. Could this furnish a possible defense for 1-800-Flowers? If there was already ample evidence of Greer’s infidelity, can 1-800-Flowers really be blamed for his marriage unraveling?
Earlier: Lawsuit of the Day: Greer v. 1-800-Flowers
Earlier this week, we reported on King & Spalding raising starting salaries for its associates to $145,000.
A subsequent article, in the Fulton County Daily Report, contained this interesting analysis:
[Legal recruiter Raffaele V.] Murdocca predicted that King & Spalding would not simply match the new Alston & Bird pay scale for more senior classes. “A lot of associates are upset with how much pay compression there is at Alston & Bird,” he pointed out.
Alston increased pay by $15,000 for first-year associates but in smaller increments for more senior associate classes, so there is only a $45,000 difference between the salaries of the firm’s first- and seventh-year associates….
“That is not a lot of money when dealing with very different levels of experience,” said Murdocca. “Mid-level and senior associates are doing a substantial amount of work and are very valuable. The firm does not want to upset them….”
For ATL readers in ATL, there’s additional discussion after the jump.
Our series of open threads on the workplace perks provided by large law firms continues. How could it not? The fringe benefits of Biglaw are seemingly unlimited.
Today’s reader request:
Another perk post option: a thread exploring BigLaw firm retreats, and other company-sponsored social events.
We like this idea. We’ve heard of firms holding lavish retreats, both for summer associates and full-time lawyers, in some delightful destinations. In many cases, lawyers can bring their spouses, turning the retreat into a paid mini-vacation.
By way of example, Hogan & Hartson has a retreat for its summer associates at a resort in the Blue Ridge Mountains. In recent years, Kirkland & Ellis has held a firm retreat for its full-time lawyers at the luxurious Hotel Hershey. Who wouldn’t want to hit the Chocolate Spa, for a “Couples Cocoa Massage” with Pepperdine Law Dean (and K&E Of Counsel) Ken Starr?
In the comments, please describe your fabulous firm retreat, in all of the mouthwatering, travel-porn detail you can muster. Thanks.
If you’re a married man planning on sending flowers to your mistress, we have a tip for you: do NOT use 1-800-FLOWERS (as if you needed to be told).
Check out this interesting case, filed in the Southern District of Texas (Houston), and included in this morning’s Courthouse News Service (subscription):
Leroy Greer v. 1-800-Flowers.Com Inc.
Breach of contract action in which the defendants agreed to keep the plaintiff’s order of flowers for his girlfriend private, with no record of the transaction mailed to him at his home or office.
Months later, the defendants sent a thank you card to the plaintiff’s home, and his wife called the defendants for proof of the purchase. The defendants faxed the plaintiff’s wife proof of his order of flowers for his girlfriend, which resulted in a divorce being filed.
Oh crap. In terms of tales of infidelity getting exposed, this one is definitely up there.
If plaintiff Leroy Greer prevails, what would be the appropriate measure of damages? Will 1-800-FLOWERS reimburse him for his divorce settlement, as a form of consequential damages?
And what about alimony — will they pick up the tab for that? Or can they just send his ex-wife a bouquet of carnations each month, for the rest of her life?
Update: More details about the lawsuit appear here.
Correction: Thanks, commenters. Scratch the reference to “alimony,” and replace it with “spousal support.”
Leroy Greer v. 1-800-Flowers.Com (subscription) [Courthouse News Service]
It’s often said — especially by associates who have nothing to do the whole day, then get an assignment at 5 p.m. that’s due the following morning — that lawyers (read: partners) aren’t very good managers. This shouldn’t come as a huge surprise, since very few of them are trained in management. This also explains why many top firms have a CEO or CFO — an MBA-type, rather than a lawyer, tasked with overseeing the business aspects of Biglaw (so the lawyers can focus on lawyering).
If you’re an associate with an MBA degree, will law firms compensate you for that additional expertise? One reader is curious:
I was wondering if you could start a thread or do some research about JD/MBA bonuses. I’ve heard, for instance, that Weil gives a $50K bonus plus a year’s credit, while Willkie gives a $40K bonus plus a year’s credit. I’ve also heard that Latham gives a $20K bonus and no credit.
I’m trying to get a better sense of what market is for JD/MBA. I’m also curious about what happens when you clerk (i.e., whether it would be similar to doing a 2 year clerkship and hence a 70K bonus at top firms).
Are these figures correct? Any other thoughts or additional information on this subject? Please share what you know, in the comments.
Here’s a related inquiry, from a second reader:
Please consider opening a perk thread dealing with non-CLE continuing education — that is, firms which will pay for or assist with tuition costs for ongoing educational programs or degrees, such as MBAs.
We tend to doubt there are many firms that will pay for their associates to get business degrees, since firms have little incentive to make their associates even more attractive to investment banks and hedge funds than they already are. But we’re happy to pose the question to our readership. Anyone?
P.S. We already did a perk thread on regular CLE, which you can access here.
Last week we alluded to the possibility that Roy Pearson, plaintiff in the notorious $54 million pants case, might not be reappointed to his post as an administrative law judge. That possibility is now one step closer to being realized. From the Washington Post:
A city commission has voted to formally notify Administrative Law Judge Roy Pearson that he may not be reappointed to the bench, according to a government source.
In a letter sent to Pearson yesterday, the Commission on Selection and Tenure of Administrative Law Judges cited not only Pearson’s infamous failed lawsuit against Custom Cleaners, but his work as a judge the past two years.
So it’s not just about the pants. Pearson was also talking trash about his chief:
Concerns about Pearson’s temperament as an administrative law judge preceded the publicity about the lawsuit this spring….
In e-mails sent to his fellow judges and cited in the letter, Pearson’s contempt for Chief Administrative Law Judge Tyrone T. Butler was evident. In one of the missives, he spoke of protecting himself from any attempt by Butler “to knife” him. In another, he questioned Butler’s competence and integrity.
Talk of a knife fight? Is Roy Pearson a judge, or a summer associate?
David Nieporent, at Overlawyered, sums up the situation nicely: “Apparently trying to destroy a business by using the legal system to extort millions from the owners isn’t his big sin; his big sin is being rude to his boss.”
Litigious Judge’s Future Unclear [Washington Post]
Updates – August 8 [Overlawyered]
Earlier: Roy Pearson: No Justice, No Pants… No Job
* Relaxed and confident, with a mischievous grin and a wag of her finger, our favorite lawyer-turned-politician declares: “I’m your girl.” [YouTube]
* Crickets chirping on the Fourth Circuit, as former conservative bastion drifts leftward. [Washington Post]
* If you employ illegal immigrants, watch out: the feds are coming. [New York Times]
* WSJ Law Blog uses “benchslap,” a coinage of ours, in a headline — about a patent case, no less. Impressive! [WSJ Law Blog]
* A piece about the other Mike McConnell — the intelligence czar, not the brainy Tenth Circuit judge — and his role in putting together the just-passed surveillance legislation. [New York Times]
* En banc D.C. Circuit says: No experimental drug hits 4 terminally ill. (We briefly mentioned this decision yesterday, and some commenters had a lively debate about it, but here’s the MSM coverage.) [New York Times; Washington Post]
If you’re looking for something to do in an hour and a half, why not check out the new legal thriller on FX, Damages?
This new television series stars Glenn Close, whom we have worshiped ever since Fatal Attraction. We love a strong woman, who knows exactly what she wants — and will stop at nothing to get it.
The litigatrix role that Glenn Close plays in Damages has some similarities to Alex Forrest in Fatal Attraction. Here’s the show’s synopsis:
DAMAGES is a legal thriller set in the world of New York City high-stakes litigation. The series, which provides a view into the true nature of power and success, follows the turbulent lives of Patty Hewes (Glenn Close) the nation’s most revered and reviled high-stakes litigator and her bright, ambitious protégé Ellen Parsons (Rose Byrne) as they become embroiled in a class action lawsuit targeting the allegedly corrupt Arthur Frobisher (Ted Danson), one of the country’s wealthiest CEOs.
As Patty battles with Frobisher and his attorney Ray Fiske (Željko Ivanek), Ellen Parsons will be front and center, witnessing just what it takes to win at all costs, as it quickly becomes clear that lives, as well as fortunes, may be at stake.
Tonight’s episode is the third installment of the series. Some thoughts on the first two episodes, from two readers and from us, appear after the jump.