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Legal Eagle Wedding Watch: We’re in Good Company

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Legal Eagle Wedding Watch NYT wedding announcements Above the Law.jpgWe’re not the only ones who spend way too much time curled up with the New York Times wedding announcements. So does NBC Nightly News anchor Brian Williams.
Here’s his amusing (and true) commentary on the “Vows” column, aka “the Big Box,” from his blog:

In my experience, brides in the Big Box have some common traits:
They are invariably “more at home in a pair of combat boots than they are in high heels.” They are ALWAYS described as “spontaneous.”

The brides-to-be are a “constant blur of activity” and are apt to “kayak down the Hudson at Midnight on New Year’s Eve.”

Many of the men are in passionless relationships until they are hit squarely on the forehead by the club of love, in the form of the aforementioned combat-boot wearing free-spirited woman.

A fair number of these men, of course, are lawyers. Williams continues:

Weddings are always on a bluff, a dune or a “sweeping lawn,” and are usually officiated either by an Enormously Powerful Federal Judge who’s a friend of the family or a member of the online ministry community with names like “The New Life Church of the Free Spirit.” Participants seldom wear shoes.

“Enormously Powerful Federal Judge”: Isn’t that redundant?
Okay, fine, some federal judges are more powerful than others. And some federal judges officiate at NYT-featured weddings more than others. In our years of reading the “weddings and celebrations” page, we’ve noticed a lot of Judge Pierre N. Leval, of the Second Circuit. He appears to have officiated at almost 30 weddings profiled in the Times. See here.
A trivia challenge: Do you know of a federal judge who has officiated at more NYT weddings than Judge Leval? If so, please name him or her in the comments to this post.
Nonstop News [The Daily Nightly]
Brian Williams: ‘NYT’ Styles Section Is Like “Dessert on Paper” [Gawker]

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Morning Docket: 01.10.07

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* Retirement of experienced judge leaves very inexperienced Nevada Supreme Court. [Reno Gazette-Journal via How Appealing]
* Scalia the lone dissenter on the side of a criminal defendant? Then again, he does find it hard to resist an opportunity to show us all how much smarter he is than us. [U.S. Supreme Court (PDF)]
* Now, something I’m a little more used to: Thomas as the sole dissenter. You have to breach your patent agreement before there’s an Article III case or controversy, says he; the other 8 justices disagree. [U.S. Supreme Court (PDF)]
* And the Supreme Court also issued this per curiam opinion dismissing a habeas petition because it was a “second or successive” petition for which authorization was not obtained from the Court of Appeals as is required by the AEDPA. [U.S. Supreme Court (PDF)]
* Like a good neighbor, State Farm doesn’t pay for wind/flood combo damage. [CNN]
* The long and tortured media history of a long and tortured legal case. [Huffington Post / Eat the Press]

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Judge Boyle Didn’t Go Gentle Into That Good Night

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Terrence Boyle Terry Boyle Terence Boyle Terrence W Boyle Judge.jpgHere is some late-breaking judicial nomination news:
1. An update to our prior coverage of the withdrawal of the “Radioactive Four.” As one of you points out, it seems that Judge Terrence Boyle (E.D.N.C.), nominated to the Fourth Circuit, wanted to continue fighting.
From the latest version of the AP story:

William Haynes, William G. Myers III and Michael Wallace all asked to have their appointments withdrawn, these officials said. Judge Terrence Boyle was informed of the White House’s decision, according to an ally….

Lars H. Liebeler, a Washington lawyer, said in a telephone interview that Boyle, unlike Wallace, Haynes and Myers, did not submitted a letter asking to be withdrawn but was told of the president’s intentions.

This makes some sense. Considering that Judge Boyle (above right) is (1) 61 years old and (2) already a sitting federal judge, he’s not really going anywhere — and he doesn’t have much to lose from further fighting. But the White House apparently decided that continuing to push his nomination, in a Senate controlled by the Democrats, wasn’t worth the possible loss of face (or expenditure of political capital).
2. The White House released two more slates of judicial nominees today. See here and here.
The most notable and/or controversial nominees:

(a) Judge Thomas Hardiman (W.D. Pa.), renominated to the Third Circuit, who is the subject of a tempest in a teapot (item #3);

(b) Peter Keisler (OT 1988/Kennedy), renominated to the D.C. Circuit, who isn’t problematic personally, but has a “seat issue” (for years Republicans were saying that the last seat on the D.C. Circuit is unnecessary);

(c) Judge Vanessa Lynne Bryant, renominated to the District of Connecticut, who received an “unqualified” rating from the ABA; and

(d) James Rogan, renominated to the Central District of California, who once served as a floor manager in the Clinton impeachment fight, back when he was in the House of Representatives.

These nominees aren’t THAT controversial, at least compared to the Radioactive Four. We think that they ultimately can (and should) make it through the Senate Judiciary Committee, then win confirmation by the full Senate.
But the ascendant Democrats may want to flex their muscles. And one way to do so would be by delaying, or defeating, one of these nominations.
3. Here’s an AP article about Leslie Southwick, nominated to the Fifth Circuit seat formerly held by Judge Charles Pickering Sr. (the seat that Michael Wallace was up for, before he withdrew).
Southwick is a former state appellate judge in Mississippi. As Howard Bashman notes, maybe the third time will be the charm for this hard-to-fill seat.
Bush Judicial Nominees Ask to Withdraw [Associated Press]
Senators say Bush nominating Southwick for 5th Circuit [Associated Press]
Nominations Sent to the Senate for the Judiciary [White House via How Appealing]
Nominations Sent to the Senate [White House via How Appealing]
Earlier: And They Will Back Down

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Non-Sequiturs: 01.09.07

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spam spam spam.jpeg* It’s that time of the year, when you yet again resolve to no longer be an attorney. You have one more chance to make this same futile resolution when Chinese New Year rolls around. [The Complete Lawyer]
* Any food substance that sustains armies and people still living in Y2K bunkers deserves nothing less than a full-on defense of its rights. You go, Hormel. [Likelihood of Confusion]
* Healthy parenting or affirmative action? I We wonder if little Shiloh will turn out like that other token biological celebrity offspring, Satchel Ronan Seamus (or just another needy, rich, hot girl, whose mommy never loved her). [Hot Gossip at MSN Entertainment]
* Darwinism resurfaces, and thank God, because I really hate tiny dogs. [St. Petersburg Times]
* Bonus season may be behind us, but we still have money on our minds. [May It Please the Court]
* I am open to all genres of TV shows, as you may know. But this? Almost makes me long for the days of Ally McBeal. [QuizLaw]

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“First, Kill All the Transactional Lawyers?”

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pizza pizza pizza Above the Law legal tabloid blog blawg.jpgThat’s the provocative question Professor Stephen Bainbridge poses in his TCS Daily Column. We say: Don’t give the clients any ideas.
(Of course, if the dying lawyer writhes on the floor in agony for six minutes before expiring, expect to get billed for that tenth of an hour.)
Professor Bainbridge asks this rhetorical question: “[W]hy does anybody hire transactional lawyers?” After all, frequently they “giv[e] advice that could be given by other professionals.” Plus, they’re annoying. And expensive.
He outlines two competing hypotheses for explaining the work of corporate lawyers: the “Pie Division Role” and the “Pie Expansion Role.” Under the former, which takes a zero-sum view of the world, lawyers try to maximize the gains of their own client. Under the latter, which does not take a zero-sum view, “the lawyer makes everybody better off by increasing the size of the pie.”
Bainbridge argues that training of transactional lawyers should focus more on the “Pie Expansion” model. To demonstrate the limitations of the “Pie Division” role, he gives this example:

You and a friend go out to eat. You decide to share a pizza, so you need to agree on its division. Would you hire somebody to negotiate a division of the pizza? Especially if they were going to take one of your slices as their fee?

But isn’t this exactly what corporate lawyers do — and how they earn their seven-figure paydays?
We offer our own, somewhat cynical take on Professor Bainbridge’s pizza example, after the jump.

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ATL Reader Poll: A Nickname for Noah and Jeannie

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Noah Feldman Noah R Feldman Jeannie Suk Jeannie C Suk Above the Law.JPGEarlier today, we bestowed the nickname of Noajeannie upon celebrity law professors Noah Feldman and Jeannie Suk — the Brangelina of the legal academy. But some of you backseat bloggers suggested other names for this overachieving couple, such as “Feldsuk” and “Jeannoah.”
We like “Noajeannie” for several reasons:

1. It scans exactly like “Brangelina.” Compare no-ah-JEAN-nie with bran-juh-LEE-nuh.

2. It puts his name before hers, since his star arguably shines slightly brighter than hers (although, quite obviously, both of them are amazing).

3. Celebrity nicknames tend to work best with first rather than last names. This is why “Bennifer” and “Brangelina” are superior to “Vaughniston.”

Nevertheless, we will adhere to the democratic process. Hence this poll:

What’s the best nickname for celebrity law professors Noah Feldman and Jeannie Suk?
Feldsuk
Jeannoah
Noajeannie
Sukfeld
  
Free polls from Pollhost.com


One name we definitely don’t like: Sukfeld. It sounds like a pornographic version of “Seinfeld.”
(For the record, though, “Suk” is pronounced “sook” rather than “suck.” We happen to know this ’cause we went to school with Jeannie Suk’s similarly brilliant little sister, Julie Suk (now a law professor at Cardozo). Like her big sis, Julie Suk was a Marshall Scholar and a law clerk to Judge Harry Edwards (D.C. Cir.). But Julie Suk went to Harvard College and Yale Law School, whereas Jeannie Suk did the reverse: Yale College, Harvard Law School.)
P.S. Speaking of polls, if you haven’t done so already, cast your vote for your favorite First Circuit judge. We’ll close this poll tomorrow at 3 PM Eastern time. Thanks.
Earlier: Lawyerly Lairs: It’s Still Good to be Noah and Jeannie

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Bingham McCutchen: Land of the Amazons?

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amazons female lady warrior fighter.jpg
Congratulations to these five law firms, which just made Fortune magazine’s list of the 100 Best Companies To Work For:

– Alston & Bird (#19)
– Arnold & Porter (#26)
– Nixon Peabody (#49)
– Perkins Coie (#64)
– Bingham McCutchen (#94)

The Recorder has a write-up of the results, which contains some fun factoids. Did you know that each Perkins Coie office has a “Happiness Committee,” which throws surprise parties for lawyers and staff?
This is unusual. Many law firms have “Unhappiness Committees,” which are sometimes called “Personnel Committees” or “Associate Life Committees.” But we don’t know of any other firm with a “Happiness Committee.”
And here’s something we didn’t know about the #94 company on the list, Bingham McCutchen (whose name we keep on misspelling):

[A]t Bingham, women outnumber men two to one and make up 23 percent of the partner ranks — believed to be the highest percentage in the industry, according to the Fortune report.

No wonder the Bingham men are so happy.
Five Law Firms Score Places on Fortune Magazine’s ‘Best Companies’ List [The Recorder via Law.com]
100 Best Companies To Work For [Fortune]

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And They Will Back Down

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Tom Petty Won't Back Down.jpg“You can stand them up at the gates of hell,
And they will back down.”
A new Senate. A new White House counsel. And new hope for judicial nominees who might actually get confirmed. In our lifetimes.
The Bush Administration’s four most controversial judicial nominees, referred to in some Senate Judiciary Committee circles as “the Radioactive Ones,” are withdrawing (or have already pulled out, in the case of Michael Wallace). White House lawyers breathe sighs of relief, delighted by the prospect of saving some face.
From the AP:

In a concession to the Senate’s new Democratic majority, four of President Bush’s appeals court appointees have asked to have their nominations withdrawn, Republican officials said Tuesday.

These officials said that William Haynes, William Myers and Terrence Boyle had all decided to abandon their quest for confirmation. Another nominee, Michael Wallace, let it be known last month that he, too, had asked Bush to withdraw his nomination.

One has to wonder: Did all four willingly withdraw their names from consideration, or did they do so under some combination of pressure or pleading from the White House?
(Also, what will the ConfirmThem crew have to say about this?)
Bush Judicial Nominees Ask to Withdraw [Associated Press via How Appealing]
Breaking Judge News [NRO / The Corner]

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Yale Dean Harold Koh Hearts Conservatives

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Yale Law School dinner 5.JPG
Last Friday night, we attended a Yale Law School alumni dinner here in Washington, at Acadiana restaurant. It was timed to coincide with the big AALS conference of law professors in DC, since so many YLS alums are in legal academia.
The keynote speaker at the dinner was Professor Heather Gerken, who was snatched up from Harvard by Yale last year. She gave an interesting talk about her proposal for a “Democracy Index,” a national system for ranking the election-law practices of the different states. (We won’t repeat her remarks here, since Professor Gerken’s proposal is laid out in detail in her Legal Times commentary.)
Before Professor Gerken spoke, the audience was addressed by Dean Harold Hongju Koh. He updated us about recent developments at the law school, and gave the standard spiel about the brilliance and diversity of Yale’s first-year class.
(In case you’re wondering, the Yale 1Ls have a median GPA of 3.91. Their ranks include oodles of Rhodes Scholars, Marshall Scholars… and a massage therapist. You can have the Rhodies, the whole lot of ‘em; just give us the massage therapist.)
Dean Koh also delivered remarks that could be viewed as part of his new charm offensive: an attempt to reach out to YLS conservatives, in the wake of some criticism on that front.
Some random photos — plus very surprising news about Justice Clarence Thomas and Yale Law School, the alma mater he’s had a rocky relationship with — after the jump.

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Lawyerly Lairs: It’s Still Good to be Noah and Jeannie

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Noah Feldman Noah R Feldman Jeannie Suk Jeannie C Suk Above the Law.JPGWe have, on multiple occasions, shot envious glares in the direction of celebrity law professors Noah Feldman and Jeannie Suk. They’re brilliant; they’re beautiful; they’re members of the Elect (former Souter clerks).
What more could one ask for? We can think of only two things.
First, a one-word, neologistic nickname. From this point forward, Noah Feldman and Jeannie Suk will be referred to in these pages as Noajeannie.
Second, a multimillion-dollar mansion. Oh wait — they already have one. From an article by Anna Schneider-Mayerson in the New York Observer:*

If Mr. Feldman’s announcement [of his move from NYU to Harvard Law School] is only two weeks old, it’s not because he’s immune to the charms of Harvard Square.

The Middlesex South Registry of Deeds lists Noah Feldman and Jeannie Suk as the buyers of a house in Cambridge for $2.8 million. According to city records, the 1873 Victorian home has a pool, nine bedrooms and five fireplaces.

An antique home with a swimming pool — and nine bedrooms? This is a rare find.
Not many legal academics can afford a $3 million house. But then again, not many legal academics are Noajeannie.
Update: Actually, we’re going to let you vote on the best nickname for Noah and Jeannie. To access the poll, click here.
P.S. If you have pictures or information about Noajeannie’s new Cambridge home or their fabulous New York apartment, please send it our way.
* We realize the Observer piece is a little old. It came out during the dead period between Christmas and New Year’s, which is why we missed it. But we’re glad we found it, since it’s full of juicy tidbits. Read it in its entirety here.
What’s That Suck? Harvard Law School Raids Noah Feldman [New York Observer]
The Latest Triumphs of the Elect: It’s Good to Be Noah and Jeannie! [UTR]
Earlier: Musical Chairs: Professor Noah Feldman Is Leaving NYU for Harvard!

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Be Grateful for Our Litigious American Ways

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Karolina Kurkova nude naked pic photo.jpgSome people, like the Overlawyered crew, can’t stop bitching about our ridiculously litigious society. They complain that here in the United States, people sue at the drop of a hat, for the most stupid or frivolous of reasons.
But there may be an upside to our culture of litigation. From the AFP:

The leading association of US fashion designers said it would issue guidelines this week on the issue of skinny models. The Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA) will issue its findings to designers, modeling agencies and production companies by the end of the week ahead of castings for fashion week, which begins on February 2….

The former president of the Council of Fashion Designers of America, Stan Herman, last year ruled out a ban on skinny models in New York, saying such rules would expose the organizers to possible legal action.

“It would be the same as banning somebody who’s too fat,” he told AFP in September. “Those people could sue… I wouldn’t touch it with a 10-foot pole.”

Indeed. And who’d want to be on the receiving end of such a class action, filed on behalf of every runway model with a sub-18 BMI? If liability is established, damages could be astronomical. As Linda Evangelista famously quipped, those girls “don’t wake up for less than $10,000 a day.”
So when Anna Wintour says her bedtime prayers tonight, she should thank God for the trial lawyers. They’re the only ones standing between her and a bevy of big-boned beauties.
Update: And models aren’t afraid of going to court to vindicate their rights. Check out this lawsuit, the subject of a recent Second Circuit ruling.
Doctors Fault Designers’ Stance Over Thin Models [New York Times]
New York fashion group to issue guidelines on skinny models [AFP]
NYC Fashion Week to Ban Twig Girls? [Gawker]

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More SCOTUS Clerk Hiring News: October Term 2007 Hires

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supreme court hallway.jpgWe’re continuing to profile the current class of Supreme Court law clerks. We’ve written up the Alito clerks for October Term 2006 already, and we’re working on profiles of the Breyer clerks.
(We reiterate our prior request for tips about the SGB crew, especially Thiru Vignarajah. We probably have enough material about the other three.)
Looking ahead to the future, here’s what we know so far about the justices’ hiring of law clerks for October Term 2007. Most of it is taken from Wikipedia.
Caveat lector: Wikipedia, of course, can be edited by pretty much anyone. So please note that much of the information appearing below is UNCONFIRMED. We have added links to additional, confirmatory sources where available, so you can weigh for yourself the reliability of the information.
Justice John Paul Stevens
1. Todd Gluth (Boalt Hall 2005 / W. Fletcher)
2. Sara Klein (Cardozo 2005 / Barry (3d Cir.) / Lifland (D.N.J.))
3. Kate Shaw (Northwestern 2006 / Posner)
4. Abby Wright (U. Penn. 2006 / Boudin)
Justice Antonin Scalia
1. Aditya Bamzai (University of Chicago/Sutton/OLC)
2. John Bash (Harvard 2006 / Kavanaugh)
3. Bryan Killian (Harvard / Niemeyer)
4. Rachel Kovner (Stanford / Wilkinson)
Justice Anthony M. Kennedy
1. Michael Chu (Harvard / D. Ginsburg)
2. Stephen Cowen (U. Chicago / D. Ginsburg)
2. Andrianna (“Annie”) Kastanek (Northwestern 2005 / Ripple)
3. C.J. Mahoney (Yale 2006 / Kozinski)
Justice Clarence Thomas
1. William S. Consovoy (George Mason 2001 / E. Jones)
2. Eric McArthur (Chicago 2005 / Luttig)
3. Carrie Severino (Harvard 2005 / Sentelle)
4. Heath Tarbert (U. Penn 2001 / D. Ginsburg)
5. Leila Thompson (NYU / Lambert (D.D.C.) / Sentelle)
Update: Upon information and belief, William Consovoy is now scheduled to clerk for Justice Thomas in October Term 2008, not October Term 2007. For more, see here.
Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg
1. Brian Fletcher (Harvard 2006 / Garland)
2. Zack Trip (Columbia 2005 / Kearse)
Justice Stephen G. Breyer
1. Eric Feigin (Stanford 2005 / Wilkinson)
Justice Samuel Alito
1. David H. Moore (BYU 1996 / Alito)
2. Jessica Phillips (Northwestern 2006 / Flaum)
Justice Sandra Day O’Connor (retired):
1. Heidi Bond (U. Michigan 2006 / Kozinski)
(Random observation: WOW. This is shaping up as the best Term ever for Northwestern Law School, with three of its graduates landing SCOTUS clerkships so far. And U. Penn is doing quite well, too.)
As we all know, Wikipedia is not infallible. So if you have corrections (or additions) to any of the OT 2007 law clerk information appearing above, please email us. Thanks.
Update: SCOTUS Clerk Hiring News: An Errata Sheet
List of law clerks of the Supreme Court of the United States [Wikipedia]

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