Last week, we offered you this photo of Vice President Joe Biden at Syracuse University School of Law and asked you to give us your funniest caption suggestions. We then asked you to vote among ten finalists, noting that one of the finalists was not our pick. Guess which finalist won.
“Oh, no, I’m sorry … the government share of the pie is there in the pan … this slice is the part you keep.”
You guys just love rooting for the underdog, don’t you?
It was a close race, with the winner taking only 18.3% of the nearly 2500 votes cast. Our second place winner captured 17.8% of the votes:
“I hope you like it – the chef was one of our best students.”
A good dig at Syracuse is bested only by a good dig at Washington’s socialist agenda. Thanks for all your captions and for voting!
What are your thoughts on whether I should take off for the Friday of Rosh Hashanah and/or the Monday of Yom Kippur? I probably wouldn’t go to synagogue (yes, I’m Jewish), but I’d like to just take the day off to, ya know, just observe the holiday in my own way. I don’t want to get on anybody’s bad side at my white shoe firm by taking days off, especially since this place has been known to conduct stealth layoffs.
Do They Know It’s Christmastime At All?
Dear Do They Know It’s Christmastime At All,
When it comes to holidays (Jewish, Christian, Baha’i, Wiccan, whatever) you need to do what you feel is meaningful, law firm be damned. Your firm may penalize you for not showing up to work, but since there’s no hell in Judaism, you can rest easy knowing that God won’t.
The corporate slogan of Rosh Hashana, the Jewish New Year, is “A sweet New Year.” For some that may mean going to temple for two days and being around family. I know for a fact that God does not want to me to go to temple and run into better looking, more successful people or the guy from my middle school class who invented topical Viagra and now has a license to print money. God wants me to start off the new year right by sleeping in and eating cheese fries. Instead of weeping and fasting on Yom Kippur, the Jewish answer to Lent, God may want you to punish yourself by reading Dan Brown’s new book or going to a Nickelback concert. There’s just no right way to celebrate.
If you choose not to take off, working through the holidays can still be a wonderful and moving tribute to your heritage. As you work through the night drafting disclosure schedules, you will experience firsthand the anguish of your ancestors who were slaves in Egypt building pyramids for the evil tyrant Ramses II.
May the New Year bring jobs for everyone and make us all repulsively rich.
After the jump, Death Match: Christmas v. Hannukah.
From what we can tell, Janero Marchand was just your normal everyday law student. Well, a normal everyday law student who allegedly dated this woman.
Hey, the man likes fine clothes and fine women; there’s nothing wrong with that. But the gossip blog Bossip blew up his world this morning, when it made Marchand front page news:
According to our source, Rihanna has been spotted around town with a new man accompanying her by the name of Janero Marchand. 22 year old Janero is the former boyfriend of video chick Dollicia Bryan and is a current NYU Law Student. Janero, who wishes to stay out of the limelight, has been the missing link to Rihanna’s life; offering her love and support during her split with Chris Brown.
As the cops in a South Park episode might say, “nice … nice.”
There’s only one problem with the story, it’s not true.
Pesky, pesky details after the jump.
Second Life is a virtual world where people can create avatars and live “second lives” online. Started in 2003, it claims to be the largest such virtual community. The appeal seems to be that it’s just like real life — people “have jobs, purchase land, commit crimes, build homes and careers, make friends, fall in love, have sex, visit museums, and make and spend money” — except in Second Life, your avatar can also do crazy things, like fly, change appearances, and have really nasty sex.
We’re intimately familiar with neither Second Life nor sex toys, but our understanding is that the two go hand in hand. Eros LLC, a virtual sex toy maker, has apparently made a pretty penny selling sex goods in Second Life. But now other Second Life vendors are ripping off its designs and selling knock-offs. Eros’s CEO Kevin Alderman — who goes by Stroker Serpentine in Second Life and built the first in-world sex bed, a digital bed with built-in sex position animations — is filing a class-action suit against Second Life’s creators for enabling this virtual counterfeiting.
Alderman, who has been called “the ‘Hugh Heffner’ of the digital millennium,” wants Second Life to shut down its virtual version of Canal Street (counterfeit central in New York). From MediaPost:
Entrepreneur Kevin Alderman, who sells virtual erotic goods in Second Life, said in court papers that [Second Life creator/owner] Linden Lab allows other virtual marketers to offer knock-offs of his “SexGen” beds and other products.
“Eros’s virtual erotic SexGen products sold for use in Second Life have been counterfeited, cloned, and ripped off countless times by a multitude of Second Life residents,” the lawsuit alleges. “The manner in which this has occurred is akin to the knockoff handbags and purses sold near Canal Street in New York City. Some of the bags are stolen, but actual brand-name handbags sold at deep discounts, while many others are knockoffs that merely use the brand-name makers’ designs and trademarks.”
Circuit judge Richard Posner has weighed in on patent infringement of sex toys before, ruling that a company couldn’t patent the glass dildo. But what about virtual sex toy counterfeiting? We’re entering virgin territory here.
We’ve been waiting for this. We’ve been covering Boston College Law Professor Scott Fitzgibbon and his commercial against gay-marriage. That commercial is now being shown on national television (I caught it being discussed on Dylan Ratigan’s show this morning). I can’t imagine how proud the BC Law community is to have their law school prominently featured in an ad that — as one legal blogger put it: “relies on inflammatory and unfounded rhetoric.”
Today, a group of BC Law professors put out a statement that tries to soothe the feelings of gays and lesbians that may feel the university as a whole doesn’t think they should be given equal treatment.
Read it after the jump.
I’ll admit, I did not participate in any kind of fake court moot court competitions during law school. It just wasn’t my thing. But for other students, moot court can be a really exciting way to pass the time while you are waiting for law school to stop charging you money. I totally respect that.
Unless people take it too seriously. When moot court turns into gunner heaven, it’s hard not to laugh at all the Lil’ Boies running around acting like the competition is more important than 1L torts.
But at UVA Law School, it looks like the people running the school’s William Minor Lile Moot Court Competition have taken things to an entirely new level of pettiness. A UVA 2L explains it this way:
[T]he Lile Moot Court competition is our intramural moot court that 240 2Ls are competing in. It is run by appx. 10 incredibly rude and power-hungry 3Ls … and they have been inconsiderate to say the least. It’s the talk of the campus, or at least of the 2Ls.
You see what happens, Larry? You see what happens when 3Ls don’t have secure firm jobs waiting for them upon graduation?
After the jump, the members of the UVA moot court board completely lose their ever lovin’ minds.
[Speaking in the voice of the late, great Don LaFontaine] In a world where 2Ls are terrified. In a time when Biglaw openly flouts NALP rules. There was one man who would not take it anymore.
[Cue sweeping and inspiring theme song] That man was Harvard Law School’s Assistant Dean for Career Services, Mark Weber.
Without the knowledge of the general public, the law firm Sullivan & Cromwell told 2Ls interviewing with the firm that it would disregard the 45 day waiting period for holding open offers. Instead, the firm would expect a decision in just two weeks. Am Law Daily reports:
In late July, S&C called several of the nation’s top law schools and informed career services personnel at those schools that the firm would not be following the 45-day guideline, according to six sources with direct knowledge of the situation. All six spoke only on the condition that they not be identified publicly.
Instead, S&C told the career services personnel, the firm would require prospects to respond yes or no in two weeks.
But S&C wasn’t prepared for Mark Weber.
Click below to continue listening to this trailer.
* Happy Rosh Hashanah. [ABC]
* Mayer Brown and Reed Smith could be trying to kill the billable hour too. [Legal Week]
* When it comes to executing prisoners, should we allow mulligans? [Cleveland Plain Dealer]
* A Maryland police officer who t-boned a car and killed the driver could not be charged with vehicular manslaughter thanks to the state’s tough mens rea requirement. So instead, a civil jury has entered a $4 million verdict against him. [Washington Post]
* However, two Florida school administrators who violated a consent decree by leading prayer in a public school could face jail time if convicted. [CNN]
* The Senate has passed a bill to make Amtrak a more appealing travel option: Guns on trains! Now you’ll have a toy to play with during the inevitable train break down. Thanks, Second Amendment! [New York Times]
A couple of days ago, an attorney sent in an email to the New York State Bar Association listserv. Like many people, the attorney was looking for a job. He decided to ask the listserv for some helpful tips:
Subject: [nysba-nonres] (somewhat) new attorney still seeking first FT position
Its a difficult time for new lawyers graduating with gigantic student loan debts and a bad economy. I’ve been searching for two years sending out hundreds of resumes and applying for an online jobs every chance I get but it now seems hopeless.
I’m a Fordham Law School graduate and have an internship working at a small bankruptcy/divorce/immigration firm and also have been doing debt collection in state court and attending 341 hearings as a per diem attorney. I also have an interest in criminal law and litigation and therefore took hands on courses in law school: civil litigation drafting, trial advocacy, fundamental lawyering skills, criminal procedure.
I want a full time position but contract work would be helpful also.
If anyone has any suggestion as to where to apply or what to do please advise.
Everybody tells you to network to find a job in this economy. But what if you don’t know anybody? One can understand how the state bar association listserv could seem like a viable option to a recent Fordgam graduate.
Were the employed attorneys helpful to the young Fordham ram? What do you think?
* Yesterday’s O’Melveny news is still rippling through the blogosphere. Will the firm now be known as the Martin Luther of Biglaw? [Law and More]
* Remember, if you are in Washington, D.C. next Wednesday September 23rd, head down to Georgetown to meet David Lat and talk about new media and the law. [Georgetown Federalist Society Blog]
* One prominent legal blogger — and BC Law grad — is disappointed with Professor Fitzgibbon. Not because the Professor expressed his viewpoint, but because of his blatant distortion of the truth. [Legal Blog Watch]
* Can 1Ls going to law school in Maryland let us know about the defense of home case law in the state? Thanks. [Adjunct Law Prof Blog]
* Legal Rebel Tour, the week one recap. [ABA Journal]
Oh happy day! It brings us news of a beloved figure who has been long absent from these pages: Monica Goodling, our favorite DOJ diva. And the news for Goodling, a high-ranking and influential official in the Bush Administration’s Justice Department, is good.
Remember the case of Gerlich v. U.S. Department of Justice, the putative class action brought by Honors Program rejects who claimed they weren’t hired for political reasons? Many of the claims, as brought by individual plaintiffs — a somewhat dodgy motion for class certification remains pending — have been resoundingly dismissed.
From the Washington Post:
A federal judge this week dismissed civil claims against former attorney general Alberto R. Gonzales, rejecting a lawsuit by job applicants who argue that they were blacklisted from the Justice Department during the Bush era because of their ideology.
U.S. District Judge John D. Bates concluded that the unsuccessful job candidates had not followed the appropriate steps in the civil service system before filing their lawsuit in the District last year….
We currently have a number of active openings for associate roles at US and UK firms in HK / China, Singapore and two new in-house openings. As always, please feel free to reach out to us at email@example.com in order to get details of current openings in Asia, as well as to discuss the Asia markets in general and what we expect for openings later this year. Our Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney will be in Beijing the week of March 25 and Evan Jowers will be in Hong Kong the week of April 1, if you would like to meet them in person.
The US associate openings we have in law firms are in the usual areas of M&A, cap markets, FCPA / white collar litigation, finance, and project finance. The most urgent of our top tier (top 15 US or magic circle) law firm openings in Asia (among many other firm openings that we have in Asia) are as follows:
• 2nd to 5th year mandarin fluent M&A associates needed in Beijing and Hong Kong at several firms;
• Korean fluent 2nd to 4th year cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 5th year Japanese fluent M&A associates needed in Tokyo;
• 4th to 6th year mandarin fluent cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 4th year M&A / cap markets mix associate needed in Singapore.
In a land that is right here and in a time that is right now, a technology has arisen so powerful that it can replace basic human document review. Is it time to bow down before our new robot overlords?
First, here’s a little story about me: my life in the legal world began as a paralegal. My first case was a GIANT patent infringement case that was already six years old and had involved as many as five companies, multiple US courts, the ITC and an international standards committee. I knew nothing about any of this.
On my first day, my supervisor (a paralegal with at least eight other cases driving her crazy) sat me down in front of a Concordance database with a 100,000+ patents and patent file histories. “Code these,” she said. I learned that “coding”, for the purposes of this exercise, meant manually typing the inventor’s name, the title of the patent, the assignee, the file date, and other objective data for each document. I worked on that project – and only that project – for at least the first six months of my job. After a week or so, time began to blur.
What I know, in retrospect and with absolutely certainty, is that as time began to blur, so did my judgment. So did my attention to detail. If you could tell me that I did not make at least one mistake a day – one inconsistent spelling, one reversed day and month, one incorrectly spaced title – I frankly would need to see your evidence. I would not believe it. The human mind is trainable but it is not a machine.
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