‘Try and make it look painful, we’ve got a bloodthirsty audience here!’
* Allegations that a prison told a death row inmate to “put on a show” while getting a lethal injection. Just when you thought the death penalty couldn’t manifest itself as more cruel and unusual… [NBC News]
* A discussion of how early voting is bad. Apparently, after an electoral dialogue that usually lasts a year or more, we’re all lemmings swayed by the events of the last day of campaigning so there’s no justification for allowing voters to show up three days before the finish line. [Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]
* Kentucky legend Richie Farmer’s basketball jersey may be retired, but the Bureau of Prisons decided to give Farmer, now a political figure heading to prison for abusing his office, his old number back as an inmate number. Thanks? [Legal Juice]
* In last night’s State of the Union address, President Obama came out strong for patent law reform. Exactly the issue he needed to rally voters for the midterms! [Patently-O]
* And while it didn’t make the address itself, Attorney General Eric Holder is signaling a new administrative interest in reforming the out of whack sentencing laws. [Sentencing Law and Policy]
* On February 12, our own David Lat will be speaking at Georgetown at an ABA Journal sponsored talk on “#21stCenturyLaw.” Let’s see that hash tag start trending. [ABA Journal]
* Joshua Gilliland of The Legal Geeks reacts to the revelation that the new costuming for next season’s Doctor Who will ditch Gilliland’s beloved bow tie. Our hearts go out to you in your pain. Video embedded below… [The Legal Geeks]
* Harvard Law’s Langdell Library hosts a bevy of legal treasures. Including the personal lunchbox of Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. [The Harvard Crimson]
* Per a new survey, watching the Kardashians makes one twice as likely to want an aggressive lawyer. When I have to watch the Kardashians I become an aggressive lawyer. [Avvo]
* The Supreme Court spent Cyber Monday denying review to two cases challenging the imposition of sales taxes on Internet purchases. [The Blog of the Legal Times]
* New York State Attorney General Eric Schneiderman cracked down on fake Yelp reviewers. Apparently, reviewers who gave a pet groomer 4 stars are a bigger priority than the reviewers who gave subprime-backed securities AAA ratings. [Corporate Counsel]
* Not exactly breaking news, but Philly has caught on that law firms are merging because the market is so terrible with a new piece on the merger craze. Specifically, they’re looking at the planned merger of BakerHostetler and Philly’s own Woodcock Washburn L.L.P. we mentioned last week. [Philadelphia Inquirer]
* Lakers guard Steve Nash’s ex-wife is battling him for child custody. She’s hired a Phoenix law firm whose most famous attorney is jacked up NFL ref Ed Hochuli. For now Hochuli isn’t working on the case directly. For now. [TMZ Sports]
* Congratulations to Kobre & Kim on being named Law Firm of the Year by the National Asian Pacific American Bar Association. [Newsday]
* Who says Civil Procedure isn’t sexy? Some UNLV Law students take to YouTube to bring (Civ Pro) SexyBack. [You Tube]
If you haven’t been following the O’Bannon case, the former UCLA star heads up a group of current and former players suing the NCAA for improperly restraining players from negotiating the use of their own likenesses on everything from calendars and jerseys to broadcasting contracts and video games.
Judge Wilken’s ruling changes the landscape of the case and sets the parties on a collision course for trial in June. It also makes the NCAA very, very happy…
* If you thought the Redskins were offensive, I bring you the Coachella Valley High Arabs. Complete with video of their mascot! [Yahoo! Sports]
* With states increasingly losing access to tried and true execution drugs, the wardens are now experimenting on their own. This sounds (a) incredibly cruel and unusual, and (b) likely to result in creating a supervillian. [Vocativ]
* Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott fought hard for a voter ID law. And on Tuesday, he failed to meet the standards of the law he championed. Derp. [Opposing Views]
* We frequently link to the fun poetic stylings of Poetic Justice. Now you can enter a contest to win a free copy of the book! [Poetic Justice]
* In a horrific turn, a father called the cops to teach his son a lesson. Then the cops killed the son. [Gawker]
* Fear Roatti the White Tiger, Esq. Fear him mightily. [Deadspin]
* This is perhaps the weirdest law firm video ever. Video embedded after the jump… [Legal Cheek]
* A look at how one expert witness helped Mark Cuban win in the insider trading case. The government should have hired the Spurs — they figure out how to beat Mark Cuban constantly. [The Expert Institute]
* This guy forgot to book a wedding venue and rather than admit it, called in a bomb threat. How mean would his bride-to-be have to be for him to commit a crime rather than disappoint? So anyway, he’s going to jail now. [Associated Press]
* Man arrested for punching a police horse. I mean, Mr. Ed shouldn’t have mouthed off like that. [Slate]
* The chief of FERC will be joining a top law firm in Portland. Someone send Jon Wellinghoff a complete box set of Portlandia so he knows what he’s getting into. [Breaking Energy]
Last month, we brought you the titillating tale of Polina Polonsky, a “gorgeous brunette lawyer” who allegedly had an affair with Khloe Kardashian’s husband, NBA player Lamar Odom. Although it sounds like a Hollywood divorce train wreck in the making, sources claim Khloe and Lamar are going to stay together, even though the 6’10″ free agent is reportedly battling an addiction to crack cocaine, an odd drug of choice for a man of his wealth.
We know what you must be thinking: “Again with the Kardashian crap? Who cares if Lamar cheated on a Wookiee?” But today we think you’re going to care about the Kardashians if only because the lawyer involved in this torrid affair may have committed a serious breach of her ethical duties to clients at her firm.
What did this comely criminal defense attorney do that could have been so bad? Well, if your case didn’t go as planned, it may be because a washed-up basketball player like Lamar Odom was doing your legal work….
Back in 2010, Leicester Bryce Stovell, a D.C.-based lawyer, filed a pro se lawsuit against LeBron James claiming he was the star athlete’s father — and that he had the genetic material to prove it. As it turns out, the paternity test came back negative, but that didn’t stop Stovell from further alleging that he had been defamed when LeBron was quoted as saying that he “want[ed] to be a better father than [his] was.” The King’s lawyers from Squire Sanders argued that Stovell was simply delusional, and the case got bounced out of court.
You’d think that Stovell would’ve taken his ball and gone home, but earlier this spring, he returned to court to file additional defamation charges against his fantastical son for making statements about his father (i.e., anyone but Leicester Bryce Stovell) in a Sports Illustrated interview.
On Labor Day, a federal judge — the same one who originally came to the conclusion that Stovell wasn’t the father — took Stovell to task for his lacking lawyering skills…
* President Obama joins the chorus calling for an end to the 3L year. But when will students take all those Law and “Running a Massive Domestic Spying Operation” seminars? [Buzzfeed]
* At the end of this HuffPost Live clip, Elie suggests anti-gay clergy should unsubscribe from the Bravo network. Seems unfair to those who enjoy watching “Real Housewives of the Provo Tabernacle.” [HuffPo Live]
* Scottie Pippen and Horace Grant formed a dominant NBA Jam team. But without Grant, Pippen got dismantled by the duo of Easterbrook and Posner (and Williams). [FindLaw]
* Jim Beam has resuscitated Seinfeld attorney Jackie Chiles in a new ad campaign about suing bears for stealing honey. It mkaes slightly more sense when you see the whole ad. Slightly. [Hollywood Reporter]
* Judge E. Curtissa Colfield seems to have gotten a little drunker than she thought the other night and started berating cops. Maybe drinking is why she had that problem getting those decisions issued on time. [Legal Juice]
* Is rapping about crime probative to charges of committing a crime? Both the majority and dissenting opinion are worth a read. [Las Vegas Law Blog]
* Speaking of…. Taking the Notorious R.B.G. label seriously, here’s some SCOTUS-themed lyrics to Biggie’s Juicy. Embed after the jump….
* A chat with Chief Judge Alex Kozinski. Kozinski is the only interviewee who can talk about political oppression and reserve the real shock and horror for jury verdicts. [Concurring Opinions]
* On a serious note, a summer intern at Bank of America has died after pulling three all-nighters. Biglaw reminds associates that the lesson here is to get your work done faster. [Gawker via Instapundit]
* LeBron James thinks he’s actually above the law. What’s more despicable? Using celebrity to ruin everyone else’s commute so you can watch a concert or being part of the Heat? [Grantland]
* Case Western Reserve is changing its legal curriculum out of desperation an effort to revolutionize law school. [Cleveland Plain-Dealer]
* Women’s magazines make a ton of demoralizing helpful promises. What if lawyers inserted themselves into the editorial process? [The Tangential]
Unfortunately for Khloe Kardashian, a recent law school grad allegedly provided some “entertaining legal fodder” to the reality TV star’s husband, Lamar Odom. Apparently this NBA player thought he was a free agent on the basketball court and in the bedroom…
Hey, have you read Above the Law for like one single minute in the past month? If so, you probably know that we’re having this big blogger conference on March 14th at the Yale Club. Yeah, the Yale Club. You’ll be able to recognize me: I’ll be the only big… blogger guy surreptitiously holding a can of crimson spray-paint.
Speaking of coming, you should come. We’ve got CLE and all that. Click here to buy tickets to get CLE credit for listening to bloggers scream about stuff on the internet.
To refresh your memory, details on the panel that I’m moderating — almost entirely sober, mind you — follow.
My panel is called Blogs as Agents of Change, and we’re going to talk about whether all of these spilled pixels are actually making a difference. You know my view… just ask Lawrence Mitchell, but here are the panelists:
So you spent a considerable amount of time courting, selling and maybe even doing some friendly stalking of that attractive lateral partner candidate with a sizable book. After he or she ignored your emails and didn’t return your calls, a few weeks go by and you read a press release in the legal media announcing the recent move to a competing firm.
Rats. Another one got away from you. You cringe when you consider how much time was spent in meetings that did not bear fruit. Your heart aches when recall how you were led to believe this was a marriage made in heaven.
You have been rejected.
The sting of rejection is painful, even for fancy law firms. But you need to find a way that you can turn this disappointment into a legitimate learning experience.
No, this isn’t a pre-party before we come back next fall for the real thing. This IS the real thing. Quinn Emanuel is pushing the envelope on recruiting. The party is now. This is when you meet the partners and associates face to face. This is when we begin the dance that could land you an offer for your second summer BEFORE school starts in the fall.
First: You come to the party. Second: If you like us, you send your resume after June 1, 2014. Third: If we like each other, you get an offer.
We’re not waiting for fall. We’re not doing the twenty minute thing. This party is the real thing!
We hope you’ll join us, and look forward to meeting you.
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