* Mexican drug cartels are moving beyond shipping cocaine and are starting to grow the stuff too. As long as they stop hijacking lime shipments and driving up margarita prices. [Vocativ]
The prosecutor who admitted Ray Rice into a pre-trial intervention program (and there are pros and cons to that decision) specifically denied the same option to a working single mother of two who didn’t realize her out of state gun permit wasn’t accepted. She was offered a 3+ year prison deal. Because, you know… prosecutors. [Huffington Post]
* If you’re planning on getting arrested in New Orleans — and who isn’t? — don’t get arrested at night. [The Times-Picayune]
* A federal judge is accused of sexual misconduct with a clerk. I had to check twice to make sure this wasn’t just a plot point in David’s upcoming book (affiliate link). [Waco Tribune-Herald]
* Defense lawyer allegedly drives drunk… to the courthouse. [Indianapolis Star]
* The complex legal tapestry of sandwiches. [The Atlantic]
* “Mathew Martoma’s Parents Raise Some Good, Less Good Points.” [Dealbreaker]
* If you were interested in the mélange of issues surrounding privilege, whistleblowing, and litigation finance, here’s a primer. [LFC360]
* Jimmy Kimmel asked some New York Fashion Week attendees about Justice Scalia. Hilarity ensues. Video embedded below… [YouTube]
Take our quiz and test your knowledge of one of the most crucial aspects of legal tech: Ediscovery.
Who are the latest Supreme Court clerks, and how high are signing bonuses going for outgoing SCOTUS clerks?
* Mathew Martoma, the former Harvard law student who fabricated his transcript when applying for clerkships, gets nine years in prison for insider trading. [DealBook / New York Times]
* If Bingham McCutchen moves forward on merger talks with Morgan Lewis, a bunch of Bingham partners might bail. [American Lawyer]
* Congratulations to Judge Jill Pryor, who will join Judge Bill Pryor on the Eleventh Circuit. [Fulton County Daily Report]
* Can you be fired for medical marijuana in Colorado, where the drug is legal even for recreational purposes? [ABA Journal]
* Dewey have some good news for the embattled ex-leaders of the defunct law firm? [New York Law Journal]
* Home Depot is the latest major retailer to be hit by a data breach. [Washington Post]
What does Judge Wesley of the Second Circuit view as the weakness of the iPad as a work tool?
* First things first, she’s the realest: In light of the ongoing situation in Ferguson, Missouri, of course Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg acknowledged that we have a “real racial problem” in America. [National Law Journal]
* Cooley Law has experienced legal troubles over its job stats for the past few years, and a great deal of it has been handled by Miller Canfield. It raked in almost $1M from the school from 2011 to 2012. [Am Law Daily]
* Yesterday, a federal judge in Florida struck down the state’s ban on gay marriage as unconstitutional. The latest opinion is one of nineteen in favor of marriage equality. The decision was stayed, but yay for Flori-duh! [CNN]
* Half of Concordia Law’s third-year class will not be returning to school this fall because they’d rather wait to receive word on whether the school will be accredited than waste more of their time there. [Boise State Public Radio]
* Thanks to JudgmentMarketplace.com, a dentist was finally able to collect on a a years-old default judgment against Kim Kardashian — but only because a lawyer bought it from him. [WSJ Law Blog]
For about the 40th time in the last five years, Kinney Recruiting’s got a team flying to Hong Kong for visits with clients and candidates. Please feel free to reach out to Evan and Robert at email@example.com and set up a meeting with them if you would like to discuss your career and the market.
Why does Judge Wesley of the Second Circuit love using his iPad at oral argument? Let him count the ways.
* “No person, no matter how high, is above the law.” It would seem Chief Judge John Roberts is unfamiliar with many of the attorneys we write about on a daily basis. [Associated Press]
* Considering many Americans can’t name a single justice, whether the high court issues 9-0 or 5-4 opinions likely matters little, but Cass Sunstein has a study on it. [New York Times]
* Judge Mark Fuller (M.D. AL) spent a night in jail this weekend after an alleged domestic violence incident with his wife. He paid $5,000 bond before he was released. Uhh… Roll Tide? [CNN]
* The ABA moved forward with reforms to help students gain clinical and distance-learning opportunities. Alas, being paid for work was too controversial this time. [National Law Journal]
* A woman who was trapped inside a law firm as a gunman opened fire before killing himself is now suing everyone for damages. You’d probably sue, too — it must’ve been terrifying. [Times-Picayune]
* Robin Williams, the beloved actor who recently played a very disgruntled lawyer, RIP. [ABC News]
* Baker & McKenzie was bumped from the top spot in the Global 100 last year when DLA Piper swooped in to steal the firm’s glory. This year, B&M is back with a vengeance, and richer than ever. Take that, DLA dopes. [Am Law Daily]
* “I’m pretty sure I just got fired.” Before the bud business was big enough for Biglaw, the mere suggestion of going green was allegedly enough to warrant some pretty major disciplinary action from a leading law firm. [National Law Journal]
* Judge Thomas Griesa is toying with holding Argentina in contempt for saying that it didn’t default. Argentina struck back with the social media hashtag #GrieFault. Clever. [DealBook / New York Times]
* Dzhokhar Tsarnaev’s defense team has an expert who says that any jury in Massachusetts will be tainted because of the “inflammatory” news coverage of the Boston Marathon bombing. [WSJ Law Blog]
* The ABA’s new Task Force on the Financing of Legal Education held its first public hearing to try to figure out why law school tuition is high. The ABA is so late to the party it’s not even funny. [ABA Journal]
* When it comes to all of the same-sex marriage cases that are currently before the Sixth Circuit, the deciding vote could be cast by Judge Jeffrey Sutton, a Republican appointee. [National Law Journal]
* Weil Gotshal snagged a partner from right under one of its largest competitor’s noses. Ray Shrock, formerly of Kirkland & Ellis, may someday co-chair Weil’s restructuring group. [WSJ Law Blog]
* “I got the reward that most volunteers get — which is I ended up having to read many, many hundreds of pages.” This Ogletree Deakins partner figured out how to undo Obamacare in his spare time, and all he got were these lousy bifocals. [Greenville News]
* On-campus interviewing season is almost upon us, so we’re going to give you all of the tips you can stomach. Here are a few more ways that you can hit all of your interviews out of the park. [The Careerist]
* Albany Law and the University at Albany are shockingly not already affiliated with each other, but they’re exploring an “operational alliance.” Will that mean fewer faculty buyouts, or…? [Albany Business Review]
* Utah appealed its same-sex marriage case to the Supreme Court, making it the first state whose law was smacked down by an appellate court to do so. Let the countdown begin. [National Law Journal]
* In the ruling that saved Alabama’s abortion clinics, Judge Myron Thompson likened the right to have an abortion to the right to bear arms. We can think of a few people who would take issue with that. [CNN]
* In case you’ve been wondering why tax inversions are hot right now, you can blame it all on some bicycling tax and M&A lawyers from Skadden — call them bikedudes at law, if you will. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Law schools tout the fact that their graduates are finding jobs in “J.D. Advantage” positions. Meanwhile, it remains unclear how much of an advantage a law degree actually offers in these jobs. [Am Law Daily]
* In a lawsuit peppered with crazy allegations, a law prof at Florida A&M claims in a gender discrimination complaint that male professors are “paid considerably more” than female professors. [Tampa Tribune]
Litigators are like unruly kids, which is why this benchslap with a sanction straight out of elementary school is so appropriate.