Sports

Rad lawyer dad GOOOOAAAALs!

They practically dared the plaintiff to bring this lawsuit.

* Contract waiver… it’s the real thing. [Corporate Counsel]

* Vivek Ramaswamy continues to run for president for some unknown reason and just released his Supreme Court shortlist focused on the most unqualified and tantrum prone judges on the Federalist Society bench. Demeaning the bench is now a feature and not a bug. [Washington Post]

* Illinois Supreme Court upholds bail reform, rejecting bizarre argument that “only allowing rich defendants out of jail” was a constitutional issue. [CNN]

* Accomplished public interest lawyer confirmed to the Sixth Circuit. It used to be all it took to get on the Sixth Circuit was an anti-gay blogging profile. [Reuters]

* Judge Pauline Newman appeared on a podcast to discuss the efforts to sideline her. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Ben Crump enters the Northwestern football hazing scandal to represent a number of the players. The more you dig into this case the more you realize why this football team wanted to unionize so badly. [USA Today]

* Beware the legally binding emoji. [Legaltech News]

Biglaw's involved in all the big deals.

* Harlan Crow got a tax break for designating his superyacht as a profit-seeking venture. Though it seems like its voyages were limited to shuttling around his buddies like BFF Clarence Thomas. [Pro Publica]

* California Supreme Court rules that U.S. Supreme Court can’t boss it around. [SF Chronicle]

* Trump’s legal team heads to Judge Cannon’s courtroom today to give us another peak at how wacky this case will be. [Reuters]

* AI is often touted for access to justice, but without care it might make things worse. [Financial Times]

* USC Law appoints first Black dean. [Law.com]

* College athletes can earn money now, which means they can be scammed now. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Criminal division of the Department of Justice losing its boss to private practice. [Law360]

Bob Huggins is trying to pull a George Costanza and the GC isn't having it.

* This is a shocker, but law firms aren’t all that great at business. [Law.com]

* Jones Day tried to pile the risk of sanctions atop a summary judgment motion that hasn’t even been decided yet. The judge declined to indulge this lunacy. [Reuters]

* Steve Bannon ordered to pay his bills. [CNBC]

* Northwestern fired its football coach after the campus paper uncovered a string of hazing abuses. He’s hired Winston & Strawn. [The Spun]

* Proposing a ChatGPT tax to cover the cost of AI mistakes. Some form of mandatory liability insurance is probably more efficient, but yeah. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Firms need to get a jump on recruiting clerks, but “mid-trial” is too much of a jump. [Law360]

If only the Garden put as much energy into NY sports as it puts into petty vendettas.

Getting into the NBA Draft is as much about lawyering as anything else.

* Department of Justice likely to get involved in PGA/LIV merger. Weird how spending major Biglaw dollars calling one of them a monopoly might backfire when you try to merge with them. [Law360]

* After inviting thorough mocking of their legal acumen, Harlan Crow’s lawyers at Gibson Dunn back away from original “let’s just do contempt” offer and suggest a meeting with Senate staffers. [NBC News]

* Speaking of… comparing Clarence Thomas to the “lowliest” federal worker is a stark reminder that John Roberts is running a cesspool of ethical compromise. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Batman defeats Italian designer in trademark dispute. Not that it matters… that guy will break out of Arkham and be designing clothes again within a couple months. [Reuters]

* “There Is One Group the Roberts Court Really Doesn’t Like.” Take a guess! It’s fun because there’s at least three or four groups it could be! [New York Times]

* Move over law firms, legal technology vendors poised to become next fashionable cyber target. [Legaltech News]

* A dive into K-Pop and contracts. [LegalCheek]

It will shock you not at all to learn which law school professor advocating authoritarian retribution against private companies over drag.

* The new US News rankings are out for everyone to complain about and the final tally of boycotting law schools rests at 63. Congratulations… the rankings make even less sense now than before because of you! [Law.com]

* On that note, the new US News rankings also devalued faculty expertise… right when institutions in GOP-led states are attacking tenure. Great job! [Chronicle of Higher Education]

* First Circuit tosses Varsity Blues conviction, which is great news for admissions officers looking to earn some on the side. [Law360]

* Dianne Feinstein returns to the Senate allowing the Judiciary Committee to sort of function again. And all it cost is some self-imposed elder abuse. [Bloomberg Law News]

* Fani Willis drops objection to Kimberly Debrow now that the lawyer has shed a couple more clients. Honestly unsure what’s worse: the prosecutor trying to get you kicked off the case or the prosecutor then deciding, “you know what… we’re happy to have you represent the defendants.” [NY Times]

* Antitrust is broken and willing prosecutors aren’t enough to fix it because corporate stooge judges make taking a case to trial poses too much risk. And Democratic nominees have been largely to blame. [American Prospect]

* University of Maryland forced to end its streaming service after being reminded that it doesn’t own its streaming rights. This is what happens when you try to come out of your shell. [Washington Post]

Making law school dreams come true.

Nineteen states have banned transgender athletes from playing on sports teams that do not align with the gender indicated on the student’s birth certificate, and there are many more bills cruelly slashing their way through state houses.

Boston trademark party.

* Some lawyers out there are getting paid for putting together the most financially significant $1.20 deal ever. [Law360]

* Barney Frank, whose nameesake regulations could have prevented the recent bank collapses and then lobbied to support Trump administration efforts to relax those same regulations, sits on the board of now-collapsed Signature Bank. D’oh. [Twitter]

* But Frank isn’t blaming the regulatory rollback he supported. He’s blaming crypto. I guess just because it’s fake money supported by libertarian fever dreams and Ponzi schemes. Though that does force one to ask: why was his bank seemingly so exposed to it then? [Bloomberg]

* Biglaw favors laterals over home-grown associates. So you’re telling me they want all of the revenue generation with none of the training write-offs? Weird. [American Lawyer]

* Trial by combat lawyer seeking unpaid fees from former political candidate. I think I speak for everyone when I say we can resolve this with a simple joust. [NY Post]

* Michael Irvin allegations finally detailed. [Yahoo]

* Lawyers drought in rural states creates massive workloads for those who stay. [Gazette]

* NY prosecutors signal that Donald Trump is about to be indicted. It’s probably a misdemeanor for falsifying records to bribe Stormy Daniels into silence, but it’s something. [Huffington Post]

* Speaking of bribery, the trial of the Fox executives accused of bribing soccer officials results in split verdict. The only proper result for a case about a sport that drags on forever and ends in a draw. [Courthouse News Service]

* Alex Murdaugh is appealing his conviction based on… well, the filing doesn’t say but I’m sure those crazy kids will come up with something. [The Hill]

* Brett Favre’s lawyer says his defamation claims against commentators addressing the Mississippi welfare scandal are a “slam dunk.” Which is the wrong sport. [Awful Announcing]

* DoNotPay hit with class action lawsuit. Maybe the algorithm can defend them here! If the company is willing to bet a million on its ability to win a SCOTUS case, it can surely do this pro se. [CBS News]

* DOJ opposing efforts to keep judges from enhancing sentences for minor crime convictions based on allegations where the jury acquitted. See, this is a reason to be furious with Merrick Garland. [Reuters]

* Do you still use paper business cards? Should you upgrade to one of the objectively cooler options out there or are you too much of an American Psycho fan to give up paper? [Daily Business Review]

* Fox doesn’t own the Discovery Network, but discovery now owns Fox News! See… it’s a Rule 26 joke. [Law360]

* A lawyer who represents themselves may have a fool for a client, but it’s possible that a lawyer hired to represent another lawyer over the handling of Trump’s classified documents case also has a fool for a client. [Reuters]

* There’s a lot of panic that the Supreme Court will fundamentally destroy the internet as we know it, just because they’ve already destroyed voting rights, reproductive rights, and the Second Amendment as we knew them. But everyone is forgetting that the Supreme Court needs to refill its Mana meter before it can obliterate another cornerstone of society. [CBS]

* NBA team hires Weil partner to head up in-house efforts. [Bloomberg]

* Another Republican governor pushing to get the data period-tracking apps into the hands of law enforcement because unlike periods, the fascism train is never late. [Washington Post]

* Jeremy Clarkson tells a lawyer with dyslexia to “learn to spell,” because Jeremy Clarkson is a dick. [Legal Cheek]

* Hope you weren’t planning on traveling anywhere today. [CNN]

* Rate hikes or layoffs or both loom for the industry following a *checks notes* “0.1%” decline in demand. Definitely time to panic! [American Lawyer]

* Kirkland & Ellis partner buys $38 million home away from home. Compare and contrast the grave concern over that demand hit. [LegalCheek]

* Weil Gotshal seeks to remove the baseball’s goofy antitrust exemption. [Reuters]

* Americans no longer believe the Supreme Court is impartial. It’s hard to tell what drives this perception, but some experts believe it might be that the Supreme Court is objectively no longer impartial. [The Hill]

Mississippi State head coach never left a dull moment.