Curmudgeon v. Special Snowflake: Where One Person’s Constructive Criticism Is Another’s Rude And Unprofessional Rant

In a normal day, a job creator meets a job seeker. Each will do their research on the other, then meet and contemplate whether they can work together. The job creator decides not to hire the job seeker for whatever reason. Both then move on with their lives.

But today’s post is about a lawyer job creator who did not have a normal day. This is a situation where keeping it real went wrong.

I came across this LinkedIn post that gathered a lot of attention and comments. I won’t name names here because I don’t want to add fuel to the fire and enlarge muddy internet footprints. Instead, I hope that readers view this as a teachable moment in the hiring process.

A solo attorney — I’ll call him John here — was looking to fill a non-attorney position at his firm. A 23-year-old applicant reaches out to him and includes a writing sample. John turns her down, stating that her writing does not meet his standards. He returns her writing sample with a number of edits and comments while noting that his professors at Cornell (where he graduated from over 10 years ago) would have ripped it to shreds.

The applicant then wrote a scathing review of her experience with John on Glassdoor. She apparently didn’t appreciate his feedback, particularly his remark about Cornell’s unorthodox grading system. She thinks his harsh response is a reflection of his personality and management style.

The post I cited above was John’s public response to her review. He explained that his edits and criticisms were meant to help the applicant, just as his Cornell professor — a Pulitzer Prize winner — similarly gutted his papers when he was a student. He then proceeds to complain about millennials in general. The rant doesn’t state anything new. He uses the usual anti-millennial buzzwords and rhetoric: “violating safe spaces,” “helicopter parents,” and “participation trophies.” He doesn’t mention the loaded word “entitled,” but I’m sure he wanted to say it. His post featured a picture of a baby crying, which I think captures what he thinks of that generation.

One might think that John is a curmudgeon baby boomer. But after looking at his LinkedIn photo and profile, I would guess that he is in his mid-thirties.

From the looks of things, they would have been a bad fit. At least they found out sooner than later.

John’s post served several functions. First, it tried to minimize the negative impact of the Glassdoor review by presenting his side of the story. Second, it educated its readers about hiring etiquette (and the lack of it). Finally, assuming John knew that his post would anger millennials into a butthurt rage, he is trying to connect with a different group of people who he thinks are more likely to be potential clients or referral sources: baby boomers, the “Wolf of Wall Street” crowd, and people like Simon Cowell and Gordon Ramsay.

I think what happened was a misunderstanding that unfortunately turned very nasty and now very public due to a lack of empathy and ego trips. Both John and the applicant could have done things differently to avoid this.

The applicant should have appreciated John’s feedback. Most employers simply send a rejection letter with the same generic, boring statement. Something like: “Your résumé shows that you are indeed a special snowflake. But we decided to go in a different direction. Best of luck with your future endeavors.”

But John went the extra mile by providing constructive feedback. He didn’t have to do this. People like this generally want to help others in some way, even if they don’t hire you. If you leave a good impression, they can be potential mentors and may even forward other job leads.

So what if John used harsh language to critique her writing? Some people are not good at being tactful (or choose not to be). She should have looked past his words and look at his intent, which was to help her improve her writing.

And even if John is objectively a useless, narcissistic, arrogant prick, the applicant should remember what Michelle Obama said: “When they go low, we go high.” Let it go and move on.

At the very least, if you are going to burn that bridge by criticizing an employer online, do it respectfully and don’t do it in a way where he can identify you.

As for John’s interaction with the applicant, I didn’t think it was necessary to tell her that his Cornell professors would have ripped her paper apart. Whether he meant it or not, that statement came off as a power trip and a humblebrag about his privileged education. I don’t think he would dare say something like that to a judge. Particularly to state court judges who generally come from “regular” law schools. Nor would John say something like this to a paying client. For some strange reason, clients don’t like to pay people who constantly make them feel bad.

As for his LinkedIn post, I was completely on his side until he started to go off point by bashing millennials. His post alienated an entire generation based on one bad, isolated experience. Also, I’m sure that their parents don’t appreciate being criticized for doing what they thought was best for their children. And considering that John isn’t that much older than the generation he criticizes, he will have to make amends or he will have a harder time getting younger clients in the future.

So, real talk: Both job creators and job seekers have to be professional during the hiring process. If a potential employer takes the time to help you improve professionally, even if he doesn’t hire you, be thankful even it doesn’t come wrapped in happy and flowery language. But to employers, know that just because you can offer the magic J.O.B. doesn’t entitle you to act like an S.O.B. Despite the surplus of lawyers, the community is still a small one. The person on the other end of the interview table may be a mentor, short-term help, referral source, client, partner, or the person who saves your butt when you least expect it.

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Shannon Achimalbe was a former solo practitioner for five years before deciding to sell out and get back on the corporate ladder. Shannon can be reached by email at [email protected] and via Twitter: @ShanonAchimalbe.