Government

What The Hell Was Rod Rosenstein Talking About?

Give Rosenstein credit... he's relishing his role as the trickster god of the administration.

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Rod Rosenstein

It’s not clear where Rod Rosenstein stands on the potential constitutional crisis he’s charged with tending, but it’s very clear he relishes his role in keeping everyone off balance.

Rod Rosenstein appeared in New York this morning to address the Bloomberg Law Leadership Forum, drawing a packed crowd of attorneys and press hoping to get a little something from the Deputy Attorney General. But it’s safe to say that no one really came for the insights into the DOJ’s white-collar crime initiatives or more details on the Department’s new “piling on” policy.

No, everyone was well aware that hours earlier, apropos of absolutely nothing, Donald Trump tweeted the subtle yet enigmatic words “WITCH HUNT!” Apparently, Fox and Friends hit a nerve today. With his reputation so thoroughly tied to upholding the integrity of that investigation, Rosenstein had to say something in response, right? At least indirectly. He owes that to us as an audience.

And Rosenstein knows not to disappoint his audience. His recent appearances have taken on the air of tarot card readings, slyly doling out nuggets for the inquiring masses and giving the hot take crowd something to mull over or a cheeky, knowing comment to get everyone to chuckle and mutter to their friends, “see what he really meant was….”

Back on May 1, speaking at Newseum, Rod Rosenstein declared that “the Department of Justice is not going to be extorted.” It took Rosenstein and the Justice Department only three weeks to prove that the DOJ is absolutely willing to be extorted when the White House announced that Rosenstein had agreed to open an investigation into the FBI for conducting routine law enforcement tasks after Trump let it be known that he will “hereby demand” the investigation imparting an implied threat for the Justice officials who might dare defy him. Not exactly a good look for Rosenstein, but one that keeps the press coming back for more.

Today’s speech collapsed those three weeks into 23 minutes. He praised the FBI as the finest people on Earth — a Trump administration taboo — before declaring that no institution is immune from bad actors and committing to crackdown on leaks. But then Rosenstein promised that all allegations would have to stand up to a trial, intimating that he’d not allow the political headhunt that his boss might desire.

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He opened with a veritable loyalty oath. He made a callback to May 1 — but not his remarks that day. Instead, Rosenstein lavished praise on Trump’s barely passable reading of pre-prepared platitudes to commemorate the phony holiday of “Law Day.” He chased this with praise of his immediate supervisor, Attorney General Jeff Sessions, some grumbling about the slow pace of confirmation hearings — a favorite right-wing canard — and finally some positively Reaganesque riffs on the important mission the Department of Justice plays in reducing regulation on American business. No sense here that Rosenstein was anything but a company man.

Yet when he delved into the DOJ’s new “piling on” policy, explaining that Justice wants to coordinate with other agencies to avoid double punishment. He claims he took the name from his old football days — aside: what position was he, a punter? — but that he’s since learned that the term meant “joining in unfair criticism.” After the audience laughs, he notes, “so I’m not for that” (others say he said “so I’m familiar with that”). Does anyone really believe that he didn’t know what “piling on” meant? I didn’t think so. But it is another clever way to wink at the audience that he’s willing to serve as a vanguard of justice! See, an Acela corridor liberal might say, “I heard all that about how great Trump is, but what Rosenstein really meant was….”

Then there was the extended discussion of the book “Who Moved My Cheese?” a book so old that it may have moved into the public domain even with our absurdly elongated copyright laws. The book is a celebration of adapting to ever-evolving circumstances. Now, what the hell does that mean? Especially in the context of his decision to cave to Trump’s demands to go after an FBI boogeyman days after swearing that the the Justice Department wouldn’t be extorted? Because the Deputy Attorney General doesn’t speak off the cuff. In fact, he showed up with an entourage of about 11 handlers and refused to take any questions — he poured over this speech. When he goes on an extended drag about the importance of flexibility, it’s hard to see this as much other than a commentary on his May flip-flop.

And maybe that’s the message we were supposed to be left with? That Rosenstein is the administration’s trickster god — a man who will roll with the punches and leave us all dumbfounded, but ultimately someone we can all trust as really five steps ahead of us all, still clinging to his bedrock belief in justice. It’s a nice thought and if this is his message, he’s successfully conveying it in a manner that Trump is too thick to understand.

The problem with tricksters in the old stories is they usually end up the victims of their own tricks.

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HeadshotJoe Patrice is an editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.

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