Leave it to the Federal Circuit to be a bunch of narcs.
Someone named Jeffrey Nathan Schirripa appealed to the Federal Circuit and tried to establish subject-matter jurisdiction by attaching 18 samples of pot to his filing. That way, Schirripa successfully creates a contract with the federal government proving that the Controlled Substances Act can’t possibly exist.
Does that make sense? No, but that’s just because you haven’t sat down with his meticulous flowchart yet.
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Scratch that. Sat down with his meticulous flowchart and smoked up yet.
As it turns out, the Federal Circuit didn’t appreciate Schirripa’s theory and referred the matter to law enforcement:
Upon examination, Appellant affixed to each petition what appear to be samples of cannabinoids, which may be controlled substances possessed or mailed in violation of federal law.
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That must have been some “examination.” Someone get down to the Markey Building and air out the patchouli oil and incense.
(Check out the court’s order on the next page…)
Practice Note: Don’t Send Drugs to the Federal Circuit [PatentlyO]
Man Sends Marijuana Samples To Feds… To Make A Legal Point [Marijuana Moment]
Joe Patrice is a senior editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.