UPDATE: Alan Dershowitz To Represent Mike Lindell In Religious Freedom LOLsuit Against Jan 6 Committee

What could possibly go wrong?

Alan Dershowitz 3This morning we told you about Pillow CEO Mike Lindell’s razzledazzle lawsuit against the January 6 Select Committee.

He’s alleging that a subpoena for his cellphone metadata is a gross violation of his freedom of religion, because “his 2020 election integrity activities are motivated, in part, by his strongly held religious beliefs.” Also the people who listen to him shout about Chinese hackers and Dominion Voting Systems and his amazing lawsuit, which is forever two weeks from landing at the Supreme Court, are also motived by their Christian faith. And so it is illegal to look at his phone records.

On top of which, Mike Lindell is also a journalist because he makes movies about the election — but not in a Jesus way, in a “just the facts, ma’am” way, because journalism is VRY SRS BZNS. And so he is entitled to First Amendment protections as a bona fide member of the press.

Quit rolling your eyes! This is very important Constitution stuff, and not at all the ravings of a pillow pumping maniac throwing nonsense at the federal docket in hopes that something might stick long enough for Republicans to take back the House and end the inquiry into the events of January 6, 2021.

Not convinced? Well, look at this. Would Harvard Professor Alan Dershowitz be entering his appearance in Lindell’s case if these weren’t totally legit arguments?

“I will be a constitutional consultant on the first and fourth amendment issues— issues I’ve litigated and written about for many years,” Dershowitz told Above the Law.

This isn’t the first time the notable (notorious?) professor worked with Lindell. Although he didn’t enter an appearance, Dershowitz advised the MyPillow CEO on his defamatory RICO countersuit against Dominion Voting Systems.

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“Remember too that the First Amendment doesn’t only give Lindell the right to express his views,” Dershowitz told Newsweek at the time. “It gives 50 million people the right to hear his views.”

Does it, though?

And Dersh beamed into Lindell’s Election Pillowpallooza to express his concern that Dominion was cancel culturing free speech by filing defamation suits against people just for telling lies about the company and ruining its business.

“The First Amendment today is in great danger,” he warned. “It’s in great danger from corporations, from universities. It’s in great danger from the social media, from YouTube and from Facebook and from Twitter, that are censoring certain points of view and not other points of view.”

The professor did not specify how any of these entities, with the possible exception of universities, could violate the First Amendment. But perhaps he’ll explain it to us now that he’s actually appearing in the instant lawsuit.

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Or maybe he’ll just enter into an extemporaneous soliloquy on Jeffrey Epstein’s flight logs and whether he was or was not wearing underpants when he got that massage. Fingers crossed!

Lindell v. Pelosi [Docket via Court Listener]


Liz Dye lives in Baltimore where she writes about law and politics.