Porn

Attorney Misconduct

Morning Docket: 12.03.12

* When it comes to the art of law firm valuation, you may be surprised when you find out which Biglaw firm is worth the most. Here are a few hints: it’s not Baker & McKenzie, and it’s not DLA Piper or Skadden, either. [American Lawyer] * Remember back in July when this Judge of the Day was busying clicking on hardcore porn sites while in chambers? As it turns out, now he’s busy crying in court while battling to keep his judicial career intact. [Chicago Sun-Times] * Evening students are capable of doing more than ruining your class rank. Jacob Lew, once a night student at Georgetown Law, is now the White House chief of staff assisting with fiscal cliff negotiations. [New York Times] * For now, the only thing that’s keeping Florida from gaining another law school is a lack of square footage in the real estate rodeo. But that’s probably a good thing, because adding a twelfth law school would be more than a little ridiculous. [Daytona Beach News-Journal] * Samsung’s trying to get out of paying $1.05B to Apple, and their lawyers are trying to pin knowledge of the jury foreman’s misrepresentations on their technological nemesis to get the verdict thrown out. [Bloomberg] * Shakira’s hips don’t lie, but her contracts allegedly do. The sexy singer’s ex-business partner (who’s also her ex-boyfriend) is suing her for $100M to “recover his share of past and future partnership profits.” [Billboard]

By Staci Zaretsky
Non-Sequiturs

Non-Sequiturs: 08.24.12.

* Rush Limbaugh wonders if Obama is responsible for today’s violence at the Empire State Building. As usual, someone commits a crime, and Rush tries to find a black person to pin it on. [Politico] * Speaking of the shooting, this is the single best update in the history of updates. [Onion] * Here’s how the GOP is trying to work the voter fraud angle. [AlterNet] * If you are going to insult your clients, I believe the preferred nomenclature is “muppets” not “toothless cooties.” [Denver Westword] * Of COURSE porn is copyrightable. Jesus, it’s not like any bored housewife can do it, though I suppose it is fun when the try. [The Legal Satyricon] * What lawyers do in August. [Dealbreaker] * if you happen to be in Honolulu this Labor Day, first you should thank the God you pray to that you get to be in Honolulu. But then you might want to check this legal film series “The First Thing We Do, Let’s Film All The Lawyers.” It sounds pretty cool, and might be a nice break from relaxing in paradise. [Law In Film]

By Elie Mystal