Archive for October 2009

Thumbnail image for John Ensign Senator John Ensign.jpgOver the years, numerous proposals have been made to split the Ninth Circuit, the nation’s largest federal appeals court. There are certainly reasonable arguments to be made in favor of a split.
But regardless of the merits of a split, the careers of politicians who have backed these proposals seem to meet unfortunate ends. We’ve dubbed this effect the Ninth Circuit Curse. Check out this list of victims.
Last Wednesday, Senator John Ensign (R-NV) introduced a bill to split the Ninth Circuit. The very next day, he wound up on the front page of the New York Times — for possible ethics violations. Coincidence?
Politicians, consider yourselves warned: mess with the Ninth Circuit at your peril.
Senator’s Aid After Affair Raises Flags Over Ethics [New York Times]
Senate Ethics Committee investigating Ensign [Political Ticker / CNN]
Earlier: The Ninth Circuit Curse
The Ninth Circuit Curse Strikes Again

pink slip layoff notice Above the Law blog.jpgEd. note: Above the Law has teamed up with Law Shucks. Law Shucks has done excellent work translating all of the layoff news into user-friendly charts and graphs: the Layoff Tracker.
For a while there it would look like the first consecutive weeks without layoffs since this time last year (by our reckoning, you have to go back to the weeks ending October 9 and October 2, 2008). Alas, one firm did come through with staff layoffs, about which more after the jump.

As usual, we begin with the US macroeconomic picture, and as usual, it ain’t pretty. For the week, the S&P 500 was down about 2%. That was the second straight week of losses, and the DJIA had its biggest weekly decline in three months. 263,000 net jobs were lost in September and the unemployment rate rose to 9.8 percent, despite perhaps the technical end of the recession. As with the stock market, bad results are one thing, but results worse than expectations are another, and that was the case here. Consensus estimates were net losses of 175,000, so the actual results were way short. August’s revised numbers were slightly better than original reports, though.

The poor results are creating pessimism around when things will start to turn around:

[T]he report also buttressed fears that economic expansion would be weak and hesitant, with scarce paychecks and economic anxiety remaining prominent features of American life well into next year.

“This is a weak report,” said Stuart G. Hoffman, chief economist at PNC Financial Services Group in Pittsburgh. “The rate of job loss has tapered off, but we still haven’t reached the point where businesses are willing to hire.”

Could this create political difficulties for the president?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “This Week In Layoffs: 10.04.09″

Katten logo.JPGThere’s an internal debate among your Above the Law editors about whether these green shoots we keep hearing about are real. I believe. Of course, I also believe that if I don’t clap very, very hard, Tinkerbell will die.
And I believe that there are signs that the legal economy is picking up as well. Check out the statement that incoming associates of Katten Muchin Rosenman received on Friday:

In March of this year, we made the difficult decision to defer start dates for our 2009 class of first-year associates until February 1, 2010, the beginning of our fiscal year. Since then, we are fortunate to have experienced an increase in demand for our legal services in a number of core practice areas that has enabled us to offer six of our deferred first-year associates the opportunity to begin their work at Katten this month, rather than waiting until February. These associates will practice in the areas of litigation and intellectual property and are spread across all firm offices.

Yay! With news like this, who can even notice the horrifying apocalyptic stupefying new unemployment numbers?
Earlier: Sidley D.C. Wants Some Incoming Associates to Start … Early!

Toilet.jpgHere’s a strange little story that we meant to cover during the week but missed. From the Philadelphia Daily News:

Ever heard the one about the exploding toilet? Well, an Olney woman could tell you all about it, from firsthand experience….

It happened on Oct. 30, 2007, according to the lawsuit, when a toilet the woman was using “exploded” in an eighth-floor ladies’ room at the 1900 Market Street building.

“Excess water pressure caused a toilet to explode causing plaintiff to be thrown from the bathroom stall, thereby causing her severe and permanent injuries,” the suit said.

And then they tried to charge her for an enema. The nerve!
So what injuries does plaintiff claim as a result of sitting on Old Faithful?

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Lawsuit of the Day a Few Days Ago: The Temperamental Toilet”

BC Law logo.JPGWhen we first reported on Boston College Law professor Scott Fitzgibbon’s anti-gay marriage advertisement in Maine, we noted that the classes he taught were not germane to his views on gay marriage:

According to his bio, Professor Fitzgibbon teaches jurisprudence, corporations, securities regulation, and contracts. Are gay and lesbian BC Law students comfortable learning about these subjects from an anti-gay marriage professor?

But the Boston College Law School website Eagleonline has done some fantastic investigative journalism and revealed that Fitzgibbon teaches what he preaches:

In the Spring of 2008, a group of Boston College Law School students enrolled in Professor Scott T. Fitzgibbon’s “Marriage: Law and Theory” seminar formally approached Dean of Students Norah Wylie to express concern over Fitzgibbon’s allegedly improper conduct in class.

Can the law school claim that it is “welcoming” to gays and lesbians when it had an anti-gay marriage professor teaching its marriage and the law class?
Let’s look at the students’ complaints after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Students Filed Complaints Against Professor Fitzgibbon Long Before His Anti-Gay Marriage Commercial”

Non-Sequiturs: 10.02.09

Palin Vogue.JPG* Is Sarah Palin using a white supremacist ghostwriter for her upcoming book? Maybe she thought it was a clever joke when ghostwriting applicants showed up on her doorstep dressed in white sheets. [Little Green Footballs]
* If you have any questions about how to get married online, ask Kash. Questions only, not proposals. [Time Out New York]
* Harvard Law School is giving employers a second bite at the crimson apple. [American Lawyer]
* Kids who eat candy are more likely to grow up to be criminals. But kids who don’t eat candy are more likely to grow up hating their parents and stuffing them in a low cost nursing home at the earliest opportunity. You take a risk either way. [Blackbook Legal]
* Does anybody have a problem with the fact that the U.S. incarcerates a larger percentage of its population than any other country in the world? Are we okay that 1 of every 22 adult Texans is “in prison, in jail, on probation or on parole”? Either U.S. citizens are more criminal than anybody else or something is very, tragically, wrong here. [Grits for Breakfast]

Soul for Sale law student.JPGBack in the day, young lawyers would complain that they were “selling their souls” for $160K a year. But now we are in a recession and the price of a fresh soul has come down considerably. From Craigslist:

1 Soul of Healthy Young Man – $100000 (Hamden, CT)
For sale:
The gently used soul of a healthy, Roman Catholic, young twenties, quinnipiac law student.
So, let me give you some background on the product and the reasons for selling:
My student loans are piling up and I’ve realized I really don’t give a shit what type of law I practice, I’m really only in this thing to further myself economically. Problem is, my student loans are outrageous and by the time I pay them off I’ll be spending the rest of my money on Cialis and colonoscopies. I don’t want that, I don’t need that. So let’s make a fucking deal.
In exchange for the payment of my student loans you will get my soul. This is a la motherfucking carte. No organs included. No skin, no vas differens, and certainly no homunculus.

Dude, you go to Quinnipiac, can’t you get a job as a pollster?
Just the other day, we told you about a law firm that was looking for free labor from an attorney who had already graduated from law school and passed the bar. Here, this law student wants somebody to purchase his soul for $100,000 bucks. When inflated expectation meets free market capitalism the fields are soaked with the tears of the martyrs.
Read more of the ad after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “How Much Is a Quinnipiac Law Student Worth?”

blind item AboveTheLaw legal blog.jpgOne ATL reader sent this article along, writing:

I haven’t had time to read the article yet, but the headline is ‘Blind lawyer says hooker took him for 8Gs.”

Yes, that sounds like it would be of interest to Above The Law. From the Philadelphia Daily News:

John F. Peoples, 60, was steamed after he learned that the woman who he says he hired for sex allegedly overbilled his Discover card by $8,600.
So he sued her for damages and the credit-card company for alleged violations of the Americans with Disabilities Act, claiming that it had not sufficiently protected its blind customers.

Ginger Dayle, the alleged prostitute, denies being a lady of the night, instead insisting that she was actually giving Peoples Pilates lessons. Peoples says though that he is “barely able to walk, let alone do Pilates” and that sex is “one of the few exercises I get to do.” Whether for Pilates or sexual play time, Dayle bills at Biglaw rates: Peoples says he agreed to pay her $275-$375 per hour, but that she started charging him $550-$800 per hour. He signed the receipts, without realizing she had upped her price.
He reported the fraud to Discover but it chose to look the other way.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “A Blind Lawyer and His One-Eyed Monster Claim Prostitute Swindled and Discover Discriminates”

champagne glasses small.jpg
The stalk-and-eventually-marry-your-doorman phenomenon continues to enthrall the NYT weddings editors. This week they shine the spotlight on yet another bride — this time a producer at CNN — who found love in the lobby. LEWW encourages female Biglaw associates to embrace this trend. You’re in and out of office buildings all day, ladies — open your eyes to the lusciousness perched behind those security desks!
And now, this week’s finalist couples:

1. Monique Mendez and Graham O’Donoghue
2. Ashlee Conley and Andrew Veit
3. Anne Claiborne and Andrew Grotto

Read all about these newlyweds, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Legal Eagle Wedding Watch 9.27: 31 Flavors”

David Letterman Stephanie Birkitt lawyer.jpgTo paraphrase this video, inspired by an Avenue Q song and submitted to Above the Law’s first-ever Law Revue Contest, “What can you do with a JD from Cardozo?”
Um…. David Letterman? From Bitten & Bound:

David Letterman was the victim of a $2 million extortion plot and we have now discovered that according to New York public records, Stephanie Birkitt, 34, a former intern on The Late Show, lived with the accused extortionist Robert Joe Halderman, a CBS 48 Hours producer, and may have unwittingly fed him the information through the pages of her diary, photos and personal correspondence….

According to TMZ, Birkitt is one of the women who engaged in an affair with her boss, but ended it in 2003, prior to the birth of Letterman’s son….

Birkitt began working as a page for CBS New, 48 Hours, and The Late Show while still in college [at Wake Forest] in 1996. She spent a short time as an associate producer on segments for correspondent Erin Moriarty but soon decided that she wasn’t a news hound. That was when Letterman hired her as a personal assistant. She was initially brought on to handle his charities and his Indy car racing team, but her duties expanded over time.

Apparently so. Anyway, here’s the legal connection:

Birkett went on to the Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law in New York City beginning in 2005 and passed the Connecticut bar exam in February 2009.

UPDATE: As noted in the comments, Birkitt also passed the New York bar exam in February. Congrats on passing two state bars, Steph!
FURTHER UPDATE: Actually, Birkitt’s relationship with Letterman may have lasted much longer. See here.
Now, before the elitists among you start ranking on Cardozo Law, there’s something you should know.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Lawyer of the Day: Stephanie Birkitt, Cardozo Law Grad and Ex-Letterman Lover”

Quinn logo.jpgWe are fighting two wars, the economy is in the toilet, and the assassinations of Biggie and Tupac remain unsolved, but our elected leaders have spent a lot of time concerning themselves with soda (a.k.a: pop). Literally, the President of the United States is concerned about this.
Here in New York, wealthy overlord mayor Michael Bloomberg has an entire ad campaign running against soda. It’s probably just a precursor to the soda tax that is often talked about.
As a meat-eating smoker who detests physical activity and enjoys it when cows are fed beer, I’m immune to the so-called “doctors” and their calls for basic health. To me, taxing soft drinks is a violation of the social compact.
But in Biglaw, the war against soda is on. Foley & Lardner has already taken up arms against soft drinks. And it looks like Quinn Emanuel will be next.
Details after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Reversed Perk Watch: No Soda For You”

Job of the Week Lateral Link ATL logo.gifYou can’t have $17 billion in proposed deals on Monday and not need a few extra lawyers to make them happen. So the Job of the Week, brought to you by Lateral Link, is a spot for a strong corporate lawyer. Beyond corporate, things are picking up all over; this week Lateral Link has sourced opportunities for litigators, tax attorneys, IP attorneys, and, of course, bankruptcy associates.
Position: Capital Markets Associate
Location: New York, NY.
Bonus: This position qualifies for Lateral Link’s $10,000 law firm signing bonus.
Description: A top midsize New York firm is seeking a midlevel capital markets attorney with 4 to 6 years of experience from an AmLaw 100 firm. This firm boasts a 1-to-1 partner to associate ratio and its capital markets practice represents numerous well-known private equity funds and institutional investors.
For more information about this position, please view Position #5367 on Lateral Link. Membership in Lateral Link is free and you can apply at www.laterallink.com.
Earlier: Prior Job of the Week listings

Cooley Godward logo.JPGLast week, we told you that Wilson Sonsini froze staff salaries. Today, there is more pain being spread around the legal staffing world. The Recorder reports:

Fifty-eight staffers were cut Thursday, although no attorneys were let go, according to an all-hands memo from Cooley Chief Operating Officer Mark Pitchford.
“This reduction was conducted to eliminate pockets of staffing overcapacity throughout the firm,” wrote Pitchford.

Cooley laid off 62 staffers (and 52 attorneys) back in January. Last month, we reported on stealth layoffs that occurred at the firm throughout the summer.
Given the recent reductions in attorney workforce, it’s not that surprising that Cooley had an overcapacity of staff. But the math probably does not make it any easier for those that lost their jobs.
Good luck, former Cooley staffers.
Read the full firm memo after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Staff Layoff Watch: Cooley Cuts 58 Staffers”

Wildman Harrold logo.jpgWildman Harrold has decided to give a majority of its incoming associates the Fox. Am Law Daily reports that the firm has rescinded offers to 10 of its 14 associates. Unlike Arent Fox, Wildman will not be giving its would-be incoming associates any stipend.

On the Wildman Harrold career page, they really like numbers. They evidently haven’t had a chance to update their summer associate page; they’re probably busy with fall recruiting. So I figured I’d give them a hand.

Wildman, by the numbers:

* 10 – Number of offers rescinded to class of 2009 associates (out of 14).
* 4 – Number of offers extended to 2009 summer associates (out of 17).
* 10 – Number of lawyers laid off in January 2009.
* 10 – Number of lawyers laid off in April 2009.

HTH.

Wildman is a Chicago based firm. Yesterday, we told you that the Illinois bar results were out. You don’t think that Wildman rescinded offers right after the bar results came out do you? More details after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Wild News From Wildman Harrold”

Morning Docket 10.02.09

Acorn.jpg* Texas doesn’t want to see gays get married, but it’s willing to help them divorce. [Reuters]
* California AG Jerry Brown is launching an ACORN investigation. It sounds like the filmmakers will be investigated too. The statement from the AG’s office says, “[W]e have opened an investigation of both ACORN and the circumstances under which ACORN employees were videotaped.” [Fox News]
* This is why you shouldn’t use your clients’ class action settlement to play the stock market. [San Jose Mercury News]
* This Seattle lawyer will be disbarred because of a misunderstanding of the meaning of “flat fee.” [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]
* Mrs. Blagojevich wants her day in court too. [Chicago Tribune]

Lanny Davis Eileen OConnor Lanny J Davis Eileen M OConnor Orrick McDermott.jpgLast week we participated in a panel discussion at Georgetown Law that was skillfully moderated by Eileen O’Connor, the Emmy-nominated journalist turned high-powered lawyer. After the talk, we tried to play the “name game” with O’Connor regarding colleagues of hers over at Orrick. But O’Connor seemed strangely uneasy about Orrick, and she quickly changed the subject.
Could this have been why? From Am Law Daily:

Lanny Davis, a longtime Washington, D.C., lawyer who supported Hillary Clinton’s presidential bid and was a fraternity brother of George W. Bush, is taking his unique practice from Orrick, Herrington & Sutcliffe to McDermott, Will & Emery.

Davis, who previously moved to Orrick in 2003 from Patton Boggs, will bring counsel Eileen O’Connor, a former ABC News and CNN reporter, with him.

Beltway dwellers know that Lanny Davis is a big deal. He served as White House Special Counsel during the Clinton Administration, but he has friends on both sides of the aisle. As Bobby Burchfield, cohead of McDermott’s Washington office, told Zach Lowe of Am Law Daily, “Lanny is the only person I know who considers both Hillary Clinton and George W. Bush good friends.”
In addition to practicing law, Davis writes for the Washington Times and for The Hill. In one recent column, he scolded bloggers for inadequate fact-checking. If anything in this post is inaccurate, Mr. Davis, please email us and we’ll fix it ASAP.
Press release after the jump. Good luck to Davis and O’Connor in their new professional home.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Musical Chairs: Lanny Davis and Eileen O’Connor Leave Orrick for McDermott”

Tom O'Brien Thomas O'Brien Paul Hastings.JPGThomas O’Brien is the former U.S. Attorney for the Central District of California. He recently joined Paul Hastings, which trumpeted his arrival in a press release. Tom O’Brien is a public figure — he used to be the top federal prosecutor in Los Angeles, nominated by the president and confirmed by the Senate — so he’s used to a little public scrutiny.
But O’Brien couldn’t have been prepared for what happened when his girlfriend’s estranged husband took an unauthorized stroll through her email inbox. The husband found emails between O’Brien and his wife, and they didn’t make him happy.
Instead of handling the situation like a rational adult, the husband — we’ll call him “Ken” — decided to bombard the professional networks of both O’Brien and his wife (also an attorney) with the “pillow talk” emails he discovered. Ken attempted to cast the relationship between O’Brien and his (Ken’s) wife as an affair.
This is not the first time such a thing has happened. Back in 2008, the New York Times reported on a husband’s similar vendetta against a successful Wall Street banker, carried out online. Earlier this year, as Above the Law readers may recall, a cuckolded husband emailed sexting messages between his wife and a White & Case attorney to all of the lawyers at White & Case in Miami.
Ken took this aggressive strategy one insane step further, apparently emailing every lawyer he could think of. You may have already received Ken’s emails, especially if you’re in California, from Ken himself or via email forward.
Is spamming an entire professional network the new revenge of the spurned lover? Are lawyers, as members of a profession that is surprisingly small and highly reputation-conscious, especially vulnerable to this tactic? Does this approach actually work?
After the jump, let’s look at the offense and the (over)reaction.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Former U.S. Attorney v. Angry Estranged Husband
(And some reflections on reputation in the internet age.)”

Non-Sequiturs: 10.01.09

Shinyung Oh.jpg* Shinyung Oh is having a baby! Congratulations. [Because you never know ...]
* Should John Edwards go to jail? I think that when even liberals think your sexual dalliances are gross and they don’t want to have anything to do with you, you really are already in your own unique ring of hell. [Miss Trials]
* Big changes in Canadian legal journalism. [Law21]
* Texas sized capital case cover up? [Volokh Conspiracy]
* Today’s Polanski update involves comparing Polanski defenders to Catholic who covered for dirty priests. [Find Law via Althouse]
* Give it away, give it away, give it away now. [ABA Journal]

schulte logo.JPGJust the other day, we told you that things were looking pretty good for 2Ls who want to be part of Schulte Roth & Zabel’s 2010 summer program.
That positive report is of no consolation to participants in Schulte’s 2009 summer program. It looks like those kids had the bad fortune of going to law school a year too early. Their summer program was only eight weeks long, and yesterday Schulte finally got around to making offers. A tipster reports:

We’re all talking. Seems like Schulte was about 2/3rds [offer rate] or so … We had a listserv of everyone. Seems like a ton of no offers. They did no offers first.

The two-thirds of Schulte summers who received offers were not given a start date. But the benefit of having a listserv is that they are still pretty excited to have offers in comparison to their colleagues that were rejected by the firm.
Schulte declined to comment for this story. But we understand that it is full steam ahead for summer 2010.
Earlier: Schulte Roth Feeling Good About 2011

Justice Antonin Scalia headshot.jpgIn an interview with C-SPAN, Justice Antonin Scalia once again graced us with his worldview. As usual, it is as beautiful and terrible as the dawn.
The WSJ Law Blog sloughed through the interview transcripts and pulled out this gleaming diamond of truth:

I mean there’d be a, you know, a defense or public defender from Podunk, you know, and this woman is really brilliant, you know. Why isn’t she out inventing the automobile or, you know, doing something productive for this society?
I mean lawyers, after all, don’t produce anything. They enable other people to produce and to go on with their lives efficiently and in an atmosphere of freedom. That’s important, but it doesn’t put food on the table and there have to be other people who are doing that. And I worry that we are devoting too many of our very best minds to this enterprise.

I have never agreed with Justice Scalia more than I do at this very moment. I … I’ve … got something in my eye.
I move that LSAC must send this quote to anybody that applies to sit for the LSAT. I further move that anybody scoring an IQ above 139 who does not receive a federal circuit clerkship or better must forthwith abandon legal practice and be forced into labor on renewable energy, cancer treatments, or summer blockbuster screenplay editing. Do I have a second?
Scalia: ‘We Are Devoting Too Many of Our Best Minds to’ Lawyering [WSJ Law Blog]
Earlier: Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia Hates Acronyms, Loves Marisa Tomei