Colorado Did NOT Say You Could Trick Your Classmates Into Eating Pot Brownies

Lacing drugs into people's food and drink isn't a prank, it's a battery.

So, when I was in college, a guy laced some drinks with acid and I drank it and starting tripping balls, but I’d had some “experience” with that before, so I kept my stuff together (relatively speaking), and didn’t have to go to the hospital or anything. Other people at the party were not as “experienced,” and did have to be hospitalized. And even though I knew who did it, I didn’t tell anybody, because I’m not a snitch. Al Pacino would be proud of me, hooha.

True story. And I share it now because even when I was in college and on acid, I knew that tricking somebody into doing drugs was illegal. I’m not saying that I knew it was “wrong,” I’m saying I knew it was “illegal” long before I received any formal training. It’s just common sense, and I wasn’t a dumbass.

So, even when I was 19 and high, I was a foot smarter than these dumbasses in Colorado who baked pot brownies for their entire class and their professor….

Now, we’ve already discussed how Colorado’s new laws legalizing pot don’t really mean that people should feel safe smoking up whenever they feel like it. “Don’t break out the Cheetos and Goldfish too quickly,” and all that. I figured that pretty soon, I’d be doing a story with a headline like, “Dumbass Offers Bowl to Federal Officer, Confused When Narc Isn’t Cool.”

But I didn’t expect that somebody would go so far out of their way to get arrested and charged. From Gawker:

On Friday, two University of Colorado Boulder students brought brownies to one of their classes as part of something called “Bring Food Friday.” They shared the snacks with their fellow classmates and their professor. Normal enough, right? Well, it turns out the brownies were laced with pot and everyone who ate them freaked out, necessitating multiple trips to the hospital.

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I’m not a fan of the drug war or the demonetization of pot. But any drug is going to to mess you up if you are not expecting it. Have you ever grabbed a glass of what you think is water and taken a swig only to find that it’s a flat vodka-soda? Doesn’t it taste God-awful? Your brain adjusts your expectations and puts even hallucinogenic experiences into context. If you don’t know what’s happening to you, stuff like this happens:

By 10:20 that morning, paramedics and police rushed to the university’s Hellems Arts and Sciences Building after the professor complained of feeling dizzy and “losing consciousness.” Two students were also taken to the hospital, one for an anxiety attack and the other for feeling like she was going to “black out.”

Which is why lacing people’s food or drink with drugs is illegal. It would still be illegal even if the drugs were fully decriminalized.

So for those playing along at home, prank calling people is not illegal, but prank stoning people should land you in jail. HTFH.

Two University of Colorado Boulder Students Arrested for Giving Pot Brownies to Class, Professor [Gawker]

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