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goldman logo.jpg* An A.U.S.A has been immortalized in district court as “The Fat Girl.’

[Begging the Question]

* You can raise taxes on the rich as much as you like. They’re not going to pay them.

[TaxProf Blog]

* A juror in Ted Stevens’s trial is having violent outbursts during jury deliberations. (Insert Trig Palin joke here). [WSJ Law Blog]

* Morocco requires prospective adoptive parents to convert to Islam before they can have a child. I suppose lying is a skill all parents should have. [The Volokh Conspiracy]

* Just so you know layoffs aren’t confined to the legal community, Goldman Sachs … dear God. I’m switching all my investments into guns and ammo. [Dealbreaker]

Panther black.JPGPerhaps one Pittsburgh School of Law student agrees with Obama and believes that wealth should be redistributed from the rich to the middle-class. Perhaps the student believes in McCain’s policy of redistributing wealth from the rich to the super-rich. Whatever is going on at Pittsburgh, we have another case of a dirty lunch stealer.

From the Pitt Law listserv:

Please allow me to set the scene: Yesterday afternoon, at approximately 4:25pm, I placed a white plastic bag in the farthest refrigerator from the entrance of the student kitchen in the law school basement. Within this bag were two items: 1) at the bottom was a $2.99 microwave dinner (ravioli with marinara sauce); and 2) on top was a $6.99 container of spicy tuna sushi. I then went to class.

When I returned to retrieve my bag at 6:30pm, a mere two hours later, I discovered that someone had opened the refrigerator, opened my bag, lifted up my sushi, and then borrowed my microwave dinner. I say “borrowed” because I assume that no one who managed to get accepted to law school would consider stealing a $2.99 frozen dinner from a classmate who just spent almost 10 hours in the Barco Law Building. I further assume that whoever decided they really needed to borrow my meal of ravioli and cheese goodness will be returning it to me post-haste. Although I would prefer that my dinner is replaced exactly, I will also accept the

Chicken Chow-Mein Dinner by Lean Cuisine.

I appreciate everyone’s full cooperation in this matter.

I thought this sort of thing only happened at Michigan. Now I’m thinking that it is a “battleground state” problem.

This close to the election, I expect Obama and McCain to weigh in shortly.

Earlier: The Voracious Wolverine

Tulane steals Mr. Rogers shoe.JPGI had no idea that the Mr. Rogers’s shoe fiasco would turn into a three day story. I imagine that Stephen Griffin, Vice Dean of Tulane Law School, is a very nice man. He probably even helps his landlady take out her garbage.

But his handling of this issue has been nothing short of mystifying.

You might remember that when Vice Dean Griffin was begging for the shoe, he said:

Until close of business tomorrow (Wednesday) we are taking a “no questions asked” approach to this situation. Our primary goal is simply the return of the shoe. If you know anything about this incident, please report it to Dean Netherton or myself. You can also communicate with SBA President [redacted]. You can report anonymously if you wish. If the shoe is returned to Dean Netherton’s office by close of business tomorrow, the Museum will not turn over the matter to the NOPD. If it is not, the Museum will turn over the matter to the NOPD.

Well, today he sent around another email to Tulane Law students:

Because the item was returned, the museum will not file a criminal complaint with NOPD. At the request of the Law School administration, TUPD is investigating the incident under the University Code of Student Conduct.

Vice Dean Griffin

Not surprisingly, Tulane students are a little pissed:

According to another Vice Dean, the thief will likely be kicked out of school. Seems a little unfair given the “no questions asked” terminology of the last email.

Honestly, what are you doing Dean Griffin? I get that you only “promised” not to turn the thief over to the police, but “no questions asked” doesn’t really comport with “you’re getting expelled.” Don’t try to pull clever legal jujitsu on a community full of soon-to-be lawyers.

And don’t try to pass the buck to the “law school administration.” You are part of the law school administration. If you spoke out of turn initially, you’ve got to own up to that and probably apologize.

Why would anybody trust you after this? Sure, you got the shoe back and maybe it’s good to expel a “bad-apple,” but you’re hurting the community that you are supposed to represent.

Earlier: Update: It Is a Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood!

Tulane Law School: Showing Mr. Rogers How They Roll In Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood


omelveny logo.JPGMore bad news, this time from the Los Angeles market.

We’ve received word that O’Melveny & Myers has cut ties with five associates from their L.A. office. A tipster reports:

There were at least 5 associates let go today in the OMM Los Angeles office. Ranging from first years to mid-level associates. I’m not sure if they are being called performance related or if they are admitting they are layoffs.

OMM is calling them performance related. A firm spokesperson told us:

There have been no economic layoffs of associates at O’Melveny & Myers and there are no plans to conduct such layoffs. We are in the midst of our annual associate evaluation process, which began as scheduled in September, and some associates, as is always the case, are receiving less than satisfactory performance reviews.

More on O’Melveny after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Nationwide Layoff Watch: O’Melveny & Myers”

Will Work for Food 2 Above the Law blog.JPGWe warned you that you should accept your offers. We then demanded that you should accept your offers. But based on the comments, there are still some of you out there sitting on multiple offers.

Career services people have taken note, and are literally begging their students to make a decision. The latest evidence comes from Michigan:

Dear Students,

We write because we have heard from several of you that you are worried that your offers may be rescinded if an employer’s summer class is full, whether or not you have reached the 45 day period in which to respond to an offer. We have also heard that many firms are taking longer than usual to give a decision to students after callbacks.

First, there have been very few actual reports of rescinded offers at this Law School or our peer institutions. We have heard from many employers that while they are treading carefully in this economic climate, they have no intention of rescinding offers. Nonetheless, we think it prudent for you to accept an offer as soon as possible. To put it more bluntly, this is not the time to shop your offers or wait to see if a better one comes along. In addition to being in your own best interest to accept quickly, it may also assist other students who may then receive an offer that you turn down.

Obviously, some of you will not accept your offers simply to help out other students. Maybe you need actual proof that firms are rescinding offers.

We’ve got some after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Accept Your Offers: Part III”

sexy prosecutor.jpgWith Halloween around the corner, we imagine you may be desperately brainstorming costume ideas for next week. While clients may accuse you of being blood-suckers all year long, we know better.

A few years back, we knew of a paralegal who donned tighty-whities over his suit, and spent the bulk of the Halloween night explaining that he was a “legal brief.”

We went searching for other legally-themed costumes, and found “lawyer costume ideas” on Costumezee, including “sexy prosecuter [sic],” pictured at right.

She looks more like sexy school girl in high heels. Where’s the ever-present cup of coffee and boxes of discovery?

Curious as to what “sexy public defender” would look like? Check it out, along with more Halloween costumes, after the jump. We invite you to offer better ideas for costumes in the comments.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Halloween Ideas: Is Just Being a Lawyer Scary Enough?”

Kahn Mongol.JPGWonder why IP lawyers still have work? In the midst of a 177-page indictment against the “Mongols” biker gang, the government put in a charge invalidating the gang’s trademarked name.

If prosecutors succeed, the feds will own the Mongols trademark and can charge patch-wearing gang members with trademark infringement; or, at the least, have one more reason to stop them for a little sidewalk chat. Which is bound to irritate the gang members. Which may be the point.

As a person with some Chinese ancestry (that would be Elie “Ying” Mystal for those playing along at home) I am happy that the American government is finally standing up to those raiding Mongolians who come on their dread (steel) horses. Every time I try to build a wall, some goddamn Mongolian always comes to tear it down.

Of course, the government’s actions are disingenuous — soon NYPD will be able to stop anybody wearing a do-rag because it’s a yarmulke knock-off — but the Mongols leave us little choice.

Said one Mongol leader “To the last I grapple with thee; from hell’s heart I stab at thee; for hate’s sake I spit my last breath at thee.”

But we will break this gang. I don’t believe in the no-win situation.

Kirk out.

Freeze, Trademark Police [Doyle Reports]

Palin Vogue.JPG* Lehman’s lawyer fees “could reach a record $1.4 billion.”[Bloomberg]

* The RNC spent more than a first-year associate’s salary on clothes for Sarah Palin. So, when you are reading mind-numbing legal documents at midnight tonight and your friends are out partying, just dream of all the snappy red jackets you can buy. [Los Angeles Times]

* Sarah Palin’s $150,000 wardrobe was bad, but it could be worse. A Philadelphia state senator spent roughly 3.5 million dollars of tax payers money to pay personal assistants who “spied on his ex-lovers, chauffeured his children, oversaw mansion renovations, and permormed a myriad of other chores.” [Associated Press]

* The IRS withdrew a $319 million tax assessment on FedEx. [Associated Press]

* Milberg has hired NYU professor Arthur Miller to run its appellate practice. [Bloomberg]

* Recent developments in the U.S. District Court Judge Edward “Naughty” Nottingham may stop him from practicing law in Colorado. [The Rocky Mountain News]

* A former administrative law judge is still trying to sue his dry cleaner for 54 million because they lost his pants. [ABC]

Dechert logo.JPGApparently, Dechert Chairman and CEO Bart Winokur still finds Above the Law not worth his time, but that hasn’t stopped him from talking about our information elsewhere.

Winokur spoke with the WSJ Law Blog to try to clear up some things about the firm:

1. Quite apart from any characterization as to reasons why associates might have been asked to leave and contrary to anonymous posts in abovethelaw.com, there were not 10, let alone 30, associates who were asked to leave in July with or without deadline.

2. Contrary to the implication in The Legal Intelligencer article, I do not believe that we are replacing “people with better people.” To clarify what I said to The Legal Intelligencer, as associates get more senior, they need to keep doing higher and higher levels of work, and not work that can be done by their juniors.

3. Additionally, in response to the slowdown in our structured finance practice, rather than lay-off associates, we assigned associates to full-time pro bono work, where they could continue to hone their legal skills while at the same time helping others. When the economy stabilizes and business picks up, it is our expectation that they will be part of the firm’s vibrant practices.

Parsing the language after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Update: Dechert CEO Winokur Indirectly Responds to ATL”

Palin Vogue.JPG* The RNC has spent $150K on clothes for caribou barbie Sarah Palin. Is that a legal use of campaign cash? [Marc Ambinder]

* It’s been a while since we had a good, old fashioned, tax revolt in this country. Since it’s probably politically incorrect to dress up like Native Americans this time around, I think people should dress up like Olbermann and Maddow. Obamatons will never see it coming. [TaxProf Blog]

* In case you realize that you want no part of the legal industry after you pass the bar exam, but before you’ve been admitted, here’s a primer for how to make sure that your application to the bar is denied. [Legal Blog Watch]

* Some advice for firms getting crushed: be nice. [Law and More]

Pitt pearl necklace.JPGI just couldn’t resist posting this email from the University of Pittsburgh School of Law listserv:

I found a pearl necklace on the floor of the law school basement near the hallway with the microwaves.

Please e-mail me if you think it’s yours, so I can arrange to get it back to you.

Sorry about that.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

  • 22 Oct 2008 at 4:19 PM
  • Uncategorized

A Happy Letter From Simpson Thacher

SimpsonThacher.gifGiven all the horrible news yesterday, we wanted to post something positive about the legal job market.

Luckily, last week Simpson Thacher & Bartlett felt the exact same way. Taking a cue from Cleary, STB decided to send around an “aren’t you glad you received an offer from Simpson Thacher” email to last summer’s offerees:

There have been many exciting recent developments here since you left and I wanted to send news of what is going on. The firm is at the very center of the developments that are reshaping the financial world and when you return there should be some fascinating work awaiting.

For those of you who just want to know what deals are in the works, also included is news of a couple of major new engagements. For a more complete list, including some recent litigation successes, check out the Spotlight News on our web page: http://www.stblaw.com

Sounds like a flight to quality to me.

Check out the full memo after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “A Happy Letter From Simpson Thacher”

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