Caption Contest Finalists: If These Walls Could Talk... About SCOTUS Justices

Caption Contest Finalists: If These Walls Could Talk… About SCOTUS Justices

Would you be willing to hang these artsy images of SCOTUS justices on your wall?

By Staci Zaretsky on July 17, 2015 10:05 am

Earlier this week, we asked readers to submit possible captions for this picture:

Let’s have a look at what our readers came up with, and vote on the finalists.

Here are the finalists for our latest caption contest, some of which were pretty great (a few with the most “likes” from readers in Disqus, and a few underrated captions that received the most “likes” from yours truly):

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A. Nothing like Scalia’s disapproving glare to get your date in the mood for a little jiggery-pokery.

B. Justice Scalia is disturbed that no Framers were consulted in making this decorating decision.

C. Just like when reading SCOTUS opinions, going from Ginsburg to Scalia eventually leads to alcohol.

D. Alito’s in the bathroom. Watching.

E. Finally, after all these decades, Justice Ginsburg achieves heightened scrutiny for women.

F. Justice Scalia’s originalism runs so deep that he even refuses to use colors that were not present at the enactment of the Constitution.

G. Scalia likes to be on the bottom, because that’s what the framers intended.

H. “If These Walls Could Talk . . .” they’d probably beg you to burn them down, rather than continue to live with whatever insufferable hipster put up those godawful portraits.